Definitions by Fasters

Toilet App 

An app for those who need a sense of peace or tranquillity while they are doing their business, by listening to some soothing or classical music, wise biblical verses or warnings, or worldly advice from successful businesspersons or celebrities.

The subscription-based version of the toilet app not only feeds you with daily spiritual and worldly nuggets from the best brains around the globe, but also tells you which clean or dirty public toilets in your vicinity still have advertisement space to promote your products or services.

Toilet App by Fasters January 30, 2023

Lunar New Year 

A new year term used by someone (who doesn’t approve of China’s internal politics and its foreign policy in bribing or bullying many poor or developing natural resources-rich countries) to their Chinese friends, foes, or fiends rather than using “Chinese New Year.”

If you want to be in the good books of the Chinese communists or nationalists, use “Chinese Lunar New Year,” not the arguably disrespectful “Lunar New Year” or the highly disparaging “Korean Lunar New Year” to infuriate them.

Lunar New Year by Fasters January 29, 2023

Pigami 

The art of folding a square piece of paper into a π-like shape.

On Pi Day, the winner of the Pigami Contest, which will be held outside a Japanese bookstore, will be given a book voucher worth $314.15.

Pigami by Fasters January 29, 2023

π success

A geekspeak term for “50% success”—indirectly referring to the angle measure of a semicircle being π radians or 180 degrees.

For simple-minded persons, “π success” would sound like a cool way to mean “3.14% success,” but not so for symbol-minded Martians.

π success by Fasters January 28, 2023

Day Zero 

The day when you wake up and are 100% free from any bondages of a boss, because you are now getting paid without having to work—you have graduated from a tired-and-broke entrepreneur (who used to slave for sixty to eighty hours a week for yourself to avoid working forty hours a week for someone else) to a passivepreneur.

From Day Zero, you no longer need an alarm clock as you could sleep through until you feel like waking up to have your breakfast at any time of the day.

Day Zero by Fasters January 28, 2023

GTX 

The next Ponzi crypto platform—set up by the co-founders of the bankrupt crypto hedge fund “Three Arrows Capital,” in partnership with the co-founders of CoinFLEX, which recently filed for debt restructuring to recover their losses—that would allow customers from ex-unicorns like FTX, Celsius, and Luna to trade their crypto bankruptcy claims in exchange for a new cryptocurrency called “USDG.”

Trump had this bigly idea over the weekend, as he discussed with his golf buddies whether he’d launch HTX, named after FTX and GTX, to raise a few billions from MAGA patriots, who got burnt by dishonest and disgraced crypto co-founders—his proposed motto is to “Make Crypto Great Again.”

GTX by Fasters January 24, 2023

ZKP

Short for “zero-knowledge proof.” A method used in cryptography to prove ownership of a specific piece of knowledge without revealing the content of that knowledge, thus ensuring that data can be shared without sharing personal information.

Thanks to ZKP, someone can prove a particular fact sans revealing that information, thereby creating the required trust to perform a transaction on the darknet.

ZKP by Fasters January 19, 2023