suckseed

This is another term for a blow job (or fellatio) but also implies the thumbs-up-feeling the man gets from the action.

Guy: Dude, did you succeed on your first date with Brianna? Dude: Let’s just say that nobody can suckseed like Brianna!

by Epididymitis March 25, 2018

pubelic

This is the term for proudly lowering one’s pants to show-off a very bushy, unlandscaped patch of pubes in public.

Lily: OMG Daniel— I just left the grocery, and everybody saw this guy at the end of aisle 2 grinning with his whole pubic area exposed! Daniel: Wow, I can’t believe he chose aisle 2 for a pubelic.

by Epididymitis July 28, 2021

turkey taint

A cousin to the “turkey neck,” this is an even sadder part of aging in which a person’s taint sags and just hangs there like meat curtains.

Tara: I think I might go down on that old guy later and give him a “rusty trombone.” Jennifer: Okay, but just remember— don’t choke or suffocate on his turkey taint!

by Epididymitis March 04, 2019

piecycle

This is the term for a bicycle with a seat that has very negative effects on the vagina.

Derek: I am so glad we rented these bikes for our 25 miler! Jennifer: No way, bro— this seat makes me feel like I am crowning in my poonani. This is a freakin’ piecycle!

by Epididymitis July 28, 2021

nut blanket

This is the weird layer or coating that covers a peanut.

Man, I was eating some peanuts in my truck and now my seat is covered in nut blankets!

by Epididymitis March 25, 2018

Shitness of Breath

This occurs when you find yourself gasping for air while taking a dump.

Jamal: I just took a crap and could barely wipe my own ass! I guess it’s time to quit smoking. Brenda: Why? Jamal: On the toilet, I had some serious shitness of breath!

by Epididymitis December 25, 2021