suckseed

This is another term for a blow job (or fellatio) but also implies the thumbs-up-feeling the man gets from the action.
Guy:

Dude, did you succeed on your first date with Brianna?

Dude:

Let’s just say that nobody can suckseed like Brianna!
by Epididymitis May 15, 2018
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Shitness of Breath

This occurs when you find yourself gasping for air while taking a dump.
Jamal: I just took a crap and could barely wipe my own ass! I guess it’s time to quit smoking.

Brenda: Why?
Jamal: On the toilet, I had some serious shitness of breath!
by Epididymitis December 24, 2021
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turkey taint

A cousin to the “turkey neck,” this is an even sadder part of aging in which a person’s taint sags and just hangs there like meat curtains.
Tara: I think I might go down on that old guy later and give him a “rusty trombone.”
Jennifer: Okay, but just remember— don’t choke or suffocate on his turkey taint!
by Epididymitis March 03, 2019
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nut blanket

This is the weird layer or coating that covers a peanut.
Man, I was eating some peanuts in my truck and now my seat is covered in nut blankets!
by Epididymitis May 15, 2018
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piecycle

This is the term for a bicycle with a seat that has very negative effects on the vagina.
Derek:
I am so glad we rented these bikes for our 25 miler!
Jennifer:
No way, bro— this seat makes me feel like I am crowning in my poonani. This is a freakin’ piecycle!
by Epididymitis July 28, 2021
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pubelic

This is the term for proudly lowering one’s pants to show-off a very bushy, unlandscaped patch of pubes in public.
Lily:
OMG Daniel— I just left the grocery, and everybody saw this guy at the end of aisle 2 grinning with his whole pubic area exposed!
Daniel:
Wow, I can’t believe he chose aisle 2 for a pubelic.
by Epididymitis July 28, 2021
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