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Ednatoast Jeeganflipperwick's definitions

Scotchy Meter

The Scale that shows how scotchy someone is. At the top of the scale is the Scotchy Mother, then Pork Scotch. The Meter shows that no one in the Scotchy World is as Scotchy as The Scotchy Mother. She is even more scotchy than THE Pork Scotch.
Scotchy Mother: I'm the Scotchiest person in the world. The Scotchy Meter says so. I'm even Scotchier than my son, he'll never beat me.

Pork Scotch: Yes I will, Mum. Don't forget I'm a Koala.
mugGet the Scotchy Metermug.

Pork Scotch Pizzas

The greatest pizza topping in the world but unfortunately not sold by any pizza place. If you phone up a pizza place and ask for this fine pizza the 'hard working' dickhead will say "sorry mate we dont do that one." Rather than asking what is on it and making a sale. The Pork Scotch pizza is loved by fat, old, arseholes of security guards, mainly Pork Scotch himself. The topping is pork pieces in a thick gravy sauce.
MANLY GIRLFRIEND: I'm ordering Italian tonight. What do you want Max?

MAX: Just 3 Pork Scotch pizzas please.
mugGet the Pork Scotch Pizzasmug.

Nogger Menu

A small selection of food consumed by Noggers. This menu consists of:

Hhhhhrice,

Peeeaaaa, and

Fried Cickon.

Neither of these will be eaten without each other on a nog plate.
Nog: Me Hhwanta Hhhrrrice and Peeeaaa.

Waitor: Yes Mr. Ape. Back in a second.

Waitor (Back from the kitchen): Here you are sir.

Nog: Hhhhhwere's da resta me peeeeeeeeaaaaaaaa!

Waitor: I just gave it you. You asked for rice and pea, Not rice and peeeaaas.

Nog: Me gotta me hhhhrice, now me wanta me peeeeeeaaaaaa, mon!

Waitor: That is a pea.

Nog: What about me fried Chickon, Mon?!

Waitor: Your what?

Nog: Me canta have da hrice and peeaa widout da fried chickon!!!

Waitor: This is a menu, not a Nogger Menu!
mugGet the Nogger Menumug.

Maltby Bog

Formerly Known as, Nogtard's Bog. The bog that belonged to Nogtard until it was put on the Maltby Lorry aside the Pork Scotch Cone. A day after the bog claimed residency of the lorry, a packet of ginger found its way into the bog. mmm, ginger.
Nogtard: Nickin me bog then?

Dad: It belongs to the heroes now. It's called the Maltby Bog.
mugGet the Maltby Bogmug.

Pork Scotch Flu

A disgusting nig-nog disease given to many innocent people by Pork Scotch after he brought it back from his holiday to South Africa. "Me no pay for cure mon."
Monk: Pork Scotch gave us that virus because i caught it at yours and he just got back from a nogger country.

Mick: You're probably right, it was a case of the Pork Scotch Flu. Ugly, old BASTARD!
mugGet the Pork Scotch Flumug.

Maltby Road

Formerly known as Millicent Road. Location of the Maltby Lorry and its building and new location of Pork Scotch's Cone and Nogtard's Bog. Home of the Heroes.
Monk: Shall we head to Maltby Road later to see the cone and bog later?

Mick: Yeah, lets leave a packet of Hill Gingers in the bog.
mugGet the Maltby Roadmug.

Thurza

A silly old woman with rabbit teeth that wears boring clothes and always shouts at her husband for getting more birthday cards then her. When we go and visit grandad Payter, Thurza doesn't sit at the table for dinner and it's just me, dad and grandad Payter that sit there even though there's four seats. We think he has told her that she's not family so she doesn't sit at the table when we're there. When they come to pick me and dad up she's always in the car when it's only a five minute journey. She wont say a word to you until, "Dinners on the table." She keeps getting told off by Payter for spilling food all over the table cloth while dishing our dinner out. The time she will most likely yell "PAYTER!!!" is when he talks about blacks and refers to them as "Wogs."
Mrs Rabbit: I'll come along for the ride Payter.

Payter: You don't have to bother Thurza.

Mrs Rabbit: I said! I'll come along! A for the ride PAYTER!
mugGet the Thurzamug.

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