Afghan Handy

When your girlfriend pulls your grandma's afghan (the crocheted wrap that's thrown over the back of the couch) over your lap and gives you a smooth, loving tug job during movie night.
Roger busted his nut all over the couch after his girlfriend gave him an Afghan Handy.
by Eaton Holgoode February 21, 2017
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Deli Ham

A hot chick that is always DTF.
Dana is just pure Deli Ham. Imma get up in dat.
by Eaton Holgoode October 06, 2015
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Turtle Peeking

A euphemistic expression regarding the extreme urgency to defecate and holding it in as much in as possible. Having the pressure of a fecal turd poking itself partially out of the bum hole while trying to make it to the closest restroom.
Roger sprinted down the hall from his desk to the restroom. He has a turtle peeking.
by Eaton Holgoode March 20, 2017
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Spergma

The creamy amalgam of sperm and smegma. Formulated when a dude with a filthy, dick cheese riddle penis beats off and nuts all over his knob and froths it together.
My roommate left is nasty as cum rag on the couch. It was covered in dried spergma.

I really need to wash my glans more often. This smegma really makes a lot of spergma when I rub one out.
by Eaton Holgoode February 16, 2018
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Mule Harness

A cock ring used to stiffen and engorge the penis.
She only lets me do anal if I’m wearing a mule harness.

My mule harness was so tight my knob was a shade of bulging vein purple last night.

Hey reach over into the night stand and grab my mule harness if you want the man meat more rigid.
by Eaton Holgoode October 11, 2018
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Donglers

Big saggy testicles. Very low hanging. Like two tennis balls hanging in a dress sock.
by Eaton Holgoode March 25, 2017
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Buffalo Blowout

The most heinous of all rectal explosions. A firey, stinging release of wet shit caused by too many chicken wings and draft beer.
I didn't make to half time during the Super Bowl this year before I had a Buffalo Blowout.
by Eaton Holgoode March 09, 2017
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