Definitions by Earl!

titmometers 

The built-in temperature indicators (nipples) out on the ends of a woman's breasts.

According to her titmometers, damn, it's cold outside.

titmometers by Earl! July 7, 2023

Trucker Butter 

The slimy, wet residue, left on a toilet seat on a hot summer day, by a fat, greasy, sweaty trucker, after a big shit.

I used the toilet in Wal-Mart, slipped, and almost slid into the bowl, when I sat down on the seat greased with Trucker Butter.

Trucker Butter by Earl! January 28, 2023

silversitting 

Like babysitting, only for an elderly person.

My father can't be left alone, so I am silversitting him this afternoon.

silversitting by Earl! April 7, 2021

Floor Gizzards 

A box of buffalo-sauce slathered fried chicken gizzards, set on the floor of an auto body repair shop, and shared by the bros hangin' out, drinking beer, at the end of the day.

"Hey bro, help yourself to the fresh floor gizzards over by that bumper. Get me a beer too, will you?"

Floor Gizzards by Earl! February 12, 2021

fricket

One single fucking-cricket that won't shut the fuck up when you're trying to sleep.

I can't fucking sleep with that fricket making noise.

fricket by Earl! August 29, 2020