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Des Lynam's love-gland's definitions

Briggsyccino

A hot beverage, popular in art circles, comprising scrounged coffee, cadged milk and stolen sugar. Invented by and named after Briggsy, the famous art dwarf who boasted that he'd never paid for a coffee in his life.
What's that you're drinking you vile little shit?

Its a Briggsyccino.
by Des Lynam's Love-Gland October 11, 2006
mugGet the Briggsyccinomug.

Briggsysaurus

The only dinosaur still in existence. Known only as a fossil until very recently when a male specimen turned up in an art gallery trying to get off with an overweight Down's Syndrome man. Plans to keep the creature in captivity have been shelved as it has such a vile odour.
Who's the hideous man trying to get off with the fat spacker?

That's not a man. That's a Briggsysaurus.
by Des Lynam's Love-Gland September 8, 2006
mugGet the Briggsysaurusmug.

Briggsy Bonus

When a homosexual is doing his lover and then crams one or both of his testicles in as well. This is known as a Briggsy Bonus. Named after its originator who has been known to pleasure trannies in this way.
Trannie 1: I never knew what "stretched" meant until last night.

Trannie 2: So you got a Briggsy Bonus then?

Trannie 1: Yeah, by Briggsy himself.
by Des Lynam's Love-Gland September 8, 2006
mugGet the Briggsy Bonusmug.

Briggsy Beard

Facial hair grown by very spotty individuals. The Briggsy Beard serves the double purpose of partially concealing acne and avoiding shaving the tops off hideous pus-filled pimples. Most commonly grown by students and artists.
Why has that little artist grown a Briggsy Beard?

I don't know. Maybe he's not keen on slicing through those vile septic warts on his face.
by Des Lynam's love-gland December 9, 2006
mugGet the Briggsy Beardmug.

Briggsy'll Fix It

A short-lived 1990s television programme based on Jim'll Fix It in which gay art icon Briggsy made the dreams of homosexuals come true. One classic episode featured Briggsy riding a greased pig through Liverpool before masturbating into the River Mersey whilst singing "I am what I am"
Homosexual 1: I really want to be gang-buggered by a colony of baboons.

Homosexual 2: Briggsy'll Fix It!
by Des Lynam's Love-Gland November 27, 2006
mugGet the Briggsy'll Fix Itmug.

whale surfing

Metaphor for when a midget porks a humungous woman, normally in the early hours after a drinking bout at a night club.
Look at the state of Briggsy. Has he been Whale Surfing again?
by Des Lynam's Love-Gland September 5, 2006
mugGet the whale surfingmug.

briggsysexual

Used to describe someone who has heterosexual inclinations but practices homosexuality in order to fit in with their arty friends.
Oi arty dwarf boy. I saw you gobbling that artist outside the club the other night. Didn't know you were gay.

Oh I'm not gay, I'm Briggsysexual. I only suck cocks because it makes me look oh so boho.
by Des Lynam's Love-Gland August 22, 2006
mugGet the briggsysexualmug.

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