n. A Japanese psychological mass-casualty weapon, developed by scientists at the Sanrio Corporation; unleashed upon humanity in 1974 with the goal of subjugating the planet under Japanese imperial rule.
Nobody knows how Hello Kitty works, but there is no denying the tragic consequences of its use: millions of fad-crazed zombies (the "Wapanese") now trod the earth, their rational faculties obliterated by an overpowering instinct to embrace Japanese pop culture. Furthermore, they sap the economies of the Western nations by purchasing boundless amounts of worthless Japanese kitsch. With proof of the Kitty's efficacy, the Japanese have subsequently deployed even more potent mind-control weapons, including Pokemon and Dragonball Z.
Doctors warn that even low-level exposure to Hello Kitty may cause a perfectly sound mind to crack. Anyone who accidently catches sight of this Kitty (an anthropomorphic cat having a hairbow and no mouth) is advised to seek psychotherapy at once and to report the sighting to the U.S. Department of Homeland Security for immediate liquidation.
Nobody knows how Hello Kitty works, but there is no denying the tragic consequences of its use: millions of fad-crazed zombies (the "Wapanese") now trod the earth, their rational faculties obliterated by an overpowering instinct to embrace Japanese pop culture. Furthermore, they sap the economies of the Western nations by purchasing boundless amounts of worthless Japanese kitsch. With proof of the Kitty's efficacy, the Japanese have subsequently deployed even more potent mind-control weapons, including Pokemon and Dragonball Z.
Doctors warn that even low-level exposure to Hello Kitty may cause a perfectly sound mind to crack. Anyone who accidently catches sight of this Kitty (an anthropomorphic cat having a hairbow and no mouth) is advised to seek psychotherapy at once and to report the sighting to the U.S. Department of Homeland Security for immediate liquidation.
"The people of the United States have already formed their opinions regarding Hello Kitty, and well understand the implication to the very life and safety of our nation."
by Carl Willis January 12, 2005
Get the Hello Kitty mug.n. Popular and well-earned nickname for the ETS (Educational Testing Service), who produces and sells the GRE and SAT assessment tests. This parasite hauls in more than $0.6 billion in student money every year from its illegal monopoly on the testing market.
Every high school and college student in the country has to throw some big cash to ETS, the tollbooth on the highway of education. If a student doesn't pay his toll, he is usually shitcanned and forced to slave away at a McJob for the rest of his life.
by Carl Willis May 21, 2004
Get the Tollbooth on the highway of education mug.n. Japanese pornographic animation.
Also known as anime or japornimation, this type of animated cartoon is populated with characters typically having large eyes, cute figures, bright costumes, and shrill voices. Plot is superficial and of little interest to the audience, who are really watching to catch a glimpse of underage schoolgirls engaged in sexually suggestive activity (see Sailor Moon).
The defining intererest, and preferred masturbatory fodder, for the wapanese, although they are usually too ashamed to admit it publicly.
Also known as anime or japornimation, this type of animated cartoon is populated with characters typically having large eyes, cute figures, bright costumes, and shrill voices. Plot is superficial and of little interest to the audience, who are really watching to catch a glimpse of underage schoolgirls engaged in sexually suggestive activity (see Sailor Moon).
The defining intererest, and preferred masturbatory fodder, for the wapanese, although they are usually too ashamed to admit it publicly.
Every afternoon, Geoff-san would hole up in his dorm room, close the curtains, get out his laser disc player, and proceed to vigorously wank off to "LA Blue Girl" japornime.
by Carl Willis May 12, 2004
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adj. (from pp. of rarely-used SHOW UP)
To have humiliated or outclassed another with superior demonstration of skill.
adj. (from pp. of rarely-used SHOW UP)
To have humiliated or outclassed another with superior demonstration of skill.
Masta C-Dub bust out last night wif some dat smoove freestylin,' and he done showed up all them wiggas, fo sho!
by Carl Willis January 28, 2004
Get the showed up mug.by Carl Willis August 26, 2004
Get the state pen mug.n. A Thompson submachine gun, as used by Prohibition-era gangsters. So-named because the sound of a Tommy being fired in the distance resembled the sound of typing on a typewriter, and because the weapon was in popular use throughout south-side Chicago in Al Capone's day.
by Carl Willis August 25, 2004
Get the Chicago Typewriter mug.n. A list of email addresses, usually obtained illegally, to which a spammer distributes his spam. The spammer optimistically calls these addresses "leads" and may pay several hundred dollars for a list of good leads such as eBay or AOL users.
"If you do not remove me from your spamlist in the next 24 hours, I'm gonna come down there and flay you to death with a power sander."
by Carl Willis February 27, 2005
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