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Carl J. Maltese's definitions

SHIELD

Supreme Headquarters International Espionage Law-enforcement Division.
In my previous entry I had forgotten to include the word "Espionage." But, as any devout reader of Marvel Comics can tell you, both definitions are correct as Marvel briefly dropped "Espionage" from SHIELD in the late 1970's. They eventually restored it.
by Carl J. Maltese May 21, 2007
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taser

Although the word "taser" is not an acronym, one particular model is labeled as: TActical System of Electrical Response.
Sort of completes the pantheon of great acronyms. Or somthing like that.
Scenario 1-
Police Officer: "Halt eveil-doer, lest I be forced to use my TActical System of Elictrical Rosponse upon ye!"

Criminal: "Huh?"

Scenario 2:

Police officer: "Freeze scumbag!!" -sound of taser firing-

Criminal: "AAAaaagghhhh!"
by Carl J. Maltese March 29, 2007
mugGet the tasermug.

jerry falwell

See Also: The Good Year Blimp with a southern accent; Vague on eight of the Ten Commandments; Oliver North's bend-over buddy; Proud owner of several Swiss bank accounts; Jerry the Blob; Xenophobe; Persecutor; Book burning money worshiper; First against the wall when the revolution comes.
"It's time for the Old Time Persecution Hour with Jerry Falwell!"
by Carl J. Maltese May 21, 2007
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SCCC

Suffolk County Community College (aka "The Ship of Fools").

Two campuses located in Suffolk County, Long Island, New York. One in Seldon and the other in Brentwood.
Six-one-way-half-a-dozen-the-other. Both are colossal wastes of time and money.
Junior college under an assumed name.
High school with ash-trays.
One would be better-off either: A) Trying a little harder to get into a real college, or, B) Finding a well-paying blue collar job!
"I wasted two years in SCCC and all I got to show for it is an unpaid student loan and a case of the clap!"
by Carl J. Maltese May 9, 2007
mugGet the SCCCmug.

lawn darts

An out-doors game that incorporates the skill of horse-shoes with the thrill of terminal head injury.
"I was about to learn that you should never be on the receiving end in a game of 'catch the lawn darts'...."
by Carl J. Maltese November 1, 2007
mugGet the lawn dartsmug.

salvation army

A great place to find rather interesting...albeit used...books, CD's, cassette tapes, record albums, 8-track tapes, DVD's, 12" laser discs, VHS video tapes, BETAMAX video tapes, and obsolete electronic equipment.
A lousy place for finding clothes, furniture, or anything else that might be useful for day-to-day living.
"The Salvation Army thrift store is having another book sale, four for a dollar. Unfortunatley, they're also having a used underwear sale too...."
by Carl J. Maltese October 13, 2007
mugGet the salvation armymug.

Jack

Symbolic, alagorical name of that which is evil, bad, or wrong in certain novels, such as "Lord of the Flies."
"In 'Lord of the Flies' by William Golding, the character that represented evil was named 'Jack.' The character that represented good was named 'Roger,' and the character that represented order & rationality was named 'Piggy.'"
by Carl J. Maltese April 15, 2007
mugGet the Jackmug.

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