9 definitions by Beaver

Top Definition
A television program airing in the hours immediately after most kids arrive home from school. These programs mostly attempt to teach youngsters about the dangers of premature sex and illegal drug use. Scare tactics and religion-based idealogical brainwashing are commonly used in these programs. While none of these programs discuss the dangers of legal narcotics such as Paxil, Xanax, Zoloft, Ritalin, Viagra, and other Dr prescribed drug regimens (because of the fear of losing advertising revenue); safe, salutory, and remedial herbs such as marijuana are demonized due to fervent corporate funding by the oil industry, agricultural companies and the biggest corporation of all..the bible-thumping lunatics of the Christian/Catholic church. Once kids realize that they've been lied to about the dangers of marijuana, they then assume that they've been lied to about other, more dangerous, harder drugs (cigarettes, alcohol, heroin, crystal meth, crack). These programs also tend to make kids and adults feel guilty about sexual feelings and perpetuate erectile disfuntion and other sexual problems which ultimatelly manifest into lower self-esteem and other psychological disorders.
roomate: "here, hit this bowl!"
me: "no thanks"
roomate: "come on, you know you want it"
me: "no means no!"
roomate: "pussy!"
me: "you're like watching an after school special... pass the bong instead"


actor: "jenny, if we don't do it, it might fall off."
actress: "but i'm scared"
actor: "but I love you"
roomate: "turn that fucking after school special off before I beat you with the remote"
by Beaver December 07, 2004
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This man is God on bass. Just as much as Jimi Hendrix or Stevie Ray Vaughn are on guitar...but better.
People wise up.
by beaver June 06, 2004
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teh 1337est way of spelling weed
by Beaver October 25, 2003
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An amazing powerpop band out of Starkville, Mississippi. This college town band doesn't go for shitty dave covers or widespread, they're all original. This band is composed of Jason Jones - Lead Guitar/Vocals, Ben Hodge - Bass, and Mike Yager - Drums/Backup Vocals. Check them at www.youngagentjones.com.
Young agent jones rocks hardcore.
by beaver October 10, 2004
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Performing oralsex to a woman. Licking her cunt.
Please Bob, get down and face the nation!
by Beaver February 28, 2005
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when a slut is suckin yo dick, and starts to swallow your load, you karate chop her throat and the jizz comes out of her nose like walrus tusks
my bitch was goin down and using too much teeth so i set her straight with a well timed walrus punch.
by beaver July 10, 2003
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dat be where my whip is parked
"check out my new whip" "where is it at?" "yo its parked indiscreet"
by beaver July 10, 2003
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