Parannoya

The profound irritation that comes from reading outrageous conspiracy theories.
I could barely stomach reading that post about how vaccines cause the earth to flatten, and now I’m just wound up with parannoya.
by Bad Beth and Beyond April 29, 2020
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glücklichfürchten

A portmanteau of the German words for “happy” and “dread.” Cautious optimism while awaiting near-certain fuckery.
“I need to drink at least three beers before watching the election results. The glücklichfürchten is too much for me to endure.”
by Bad Beth and Beyond November 03, 2020
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abandumbfounded

Portmanteau of “abandon” and “dumbfounded.” The embarrassing feeling when you’re speaking to someone with your back turned to them, and they walk away without warning. This leaves you obliviously talking to yourself in public for a cringeworthy amount of time.
“I was telling David in the grocery store that we needed to try a more healthy alternative to soy milk, and the next thing I knew, I was alone in the dairy section yapping to nobody! That turkey had wandered off, and I was totally abandumbfounded.
by Bad Beth and Beyond January 02, 2021
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Oompahstor

Someone who poses as a tuba player, but has no idea how to play the instrument.
“Did you see that brass band? They must have had twenty sousaphone players!”

“It’s just for show. Nearly half of them are oompahstors.”
by Bad Beth and Beyond September 30, 2021
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Zump

Any nonsense word that can be perceived as offensive or vulgar, especially by a target audience that loves to be recreationally outraged.
“Did you hear that? He just called me a doozlefrazznut!”

Relax, that’s just a zump.”
by Bad Beth and Beyond November 03, 2021
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Blarmey

Blarmey: (adjective) combination of blarney and smarmy, used to describe a person who considers himself silver-tongued and compelling, but in reality oozes charm in the same way a slug or a festering pustule might. Probably developed this trait from kissing the Blarney Stone after the tour guides surreptitiously pissed on it.

(verb) An imperative pun used to call someone out on this trait.
1. “Ugh, that guy trying to bend my ear about his band is just so blarmey!”

2. “I’m not falling for your bullshit! So why don’t you just blarmey?”
by Bad Beth and Beyond July 13, 2019
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