sousaphone 

The sexiest instrument in the entire world, next to the tuba. These instruments are so studly that anyone that plays one is instanty recognized as a god, stud, or downright playa.

"Wow, like, did you see Tuba when he was playing that new sousaphone? I thought I was going to pass out from sheer lust."

sousaphone by Tuba MoFo January 13, 2006

Sousaphone 

The tuba that Stewie Griffin uses to follow fat people around.

I want that tiny sousaphone.

Sousaphone by MTGKING456 June 26, 2014

Sousaphone 

A portable tuba often used in marching bands.

Dude what is that giant thing.

Its a sousaphone. Its like a tuba only cooler, because its portable!

Sousaphone by loves me some ehm geeh beeh. August 10, 2009

sousaphone 

A sousaphone is commonly referred to as a tuba. This is the tuba of choice for many marching bands. The sousaphone section can consist of 1 person, but many bands have up to 20 of these very awkward instruments.

Warning: Use of a sousaphone without proper training can result in the injury of the player or those around him.

Warning: Sousaphones are not to be used during lightning storms.

Sousaphones are difficult to transport on buses and in cars.

sousaphone by Geebus July 25, 2004

sousaphone 

40 pounds of ultimate hotness. Those who are not seksi enough have to settle for playing a less hot instrument like the euphonium or trumpet. Those who are least gifted have to be demoted to the woodwind section, or even the drum line!

It will often cause you back problems, but who cares when you get all of the chicks! (Or guys for those less effeminate female sousa players.)

n00b: "Why is that guy's sousaphone white?"
Me: "Its because nobody likes him. Oh, and because even though he is 30 or so, he cant lift a brass sousa, so he has to carry white trash. He probably was a trumpet player"

Stupid people who dont think: "Isnt that heavy?"
Me: "uh, no, see how seksi I am?"
them: "oh, I forgot!"

Stupid people again: "Why dont they make pads for sousaphones?"
Me: "They do."

other brass: "Why did you pick the sousaphone? its so heavy!"
Me: "You dont choose to play sousaphone, it chooses you. Either that or the director forces you to since nobody wants to until they have."

sousaphone by B 4 |\| |) G33k December 31, 2008

Sousaphone 

N. A curvy penis, particular when the curvature is extreme and puts the tip of the penis in an unusual location.

Etymology - Describes a penis so curvy and knarly that it could wrap around one's body like a sousaphone.

"Hey, I need some condoms"

"Okay, what kind?"

"Uh... Model W31RD1C7"

"Damn awkward condom shoppers... HAHAHAHA YOU HAVE A SOUSAPHONE! Well if you were trying to get in my pants your shit out of luck buddy, I only fuck men who curve less than 30 degrees"

Sousaphone by qaerqg February 19, 2011

sousaphone player 

The best of the best in the marching band. Covered in bitches and drowned in hoes. Best all the way around. Best hair, best kiss, best face, best body and best sound. No one is above the sousas.

Omagash look at that sousaphone player. He/she is so fine. I got to get with that sousaphone player when nobodys around.

sousaphone player by the sousa boss August 9, 2015