Alfie the Horndog's definitions

Jesus Christ

The name Bill Cosby thought was his growing up. He thought his brothers name was "God Dammit".

According to Cosby's classic stand-up routine, his father would always yell at him and his brother.

Something like: "Jesus Christ, it's raining, get in here. God Dammit, you get in here too.".

But then one day he was playing in the yard alone and his father called him: "God Dammit, quit making such a racket!" Bill just stood there looking around for his brother. "God Dammit didn't you hear me?" yelled his father to which Bill replied, "But dad, I'm Jesus Christ!"

Jesus Christ, the Simpsons are killing us in the ratings! God Dammit we're being forced into cancellation because of a stupid cartoon!

by Alfie The Horndog September 17, 2005

moon dragon

A slang term for a bald chick. Originated from a Marvel comic book heroine by the same name.

That girl is 40DD-22-36. Who gives a shit if she's a moon dragon?

by Alfie The Horndog August 10, 2005

Amish

Owners of most of the rendering plants used to make pet food. They are all multi-millionaires, but you wouldn't know it to look at them.

Samuel Stolfutz made over 80 million last year in a deal with Purina. Man... I wish I was Amish!

by Alfie The Horndog January 31, 2008

bombard with high level microwaves

This is what happens to people when you stand on a chair while wiggling your pinky at them.

Rusty the clown stood on a chair and proceeded to bombard with high level microwaves everyone who passed by. Unfortunately he did not realize that the chair seat was contaminated with uranium 235 and he died of radiation poisoning two days later.

by Alfie The Horndog October 18, 2008

Asgard

Historical protectors of the Nordic realm. Obviously better than the Greek counterparts, since Nordic men as far less gay.

Erik The Red wasn't as gay as Alexander The Great because the Nordic warriors were equipped with better ass-guards.

by Alfie The Horndog September 5, 2005

Hong Kong dollar

The Hong Kong dollar coin is exactly the same size and weight as the American dollar coin, but the exchange rate makes it worth about 16 cents.

People can use the Hong Kong dollar coin in vending machines that accept American dollar coins! But you can get a $1.25 20 oz soda for about 32 cents and get 75 cents back!

I'm thinking of many money making schemes right now!!

I wonder if it's a federal offense to use the Hong Kong Dollar in a vending machine?

by Alfie The Horndog October 13, 2005

Internet Cop

Someone who exposes internet abusers, virus developers, hackers and posers. Has a wide variety of tricks at their disposal. Often internet cops are ex-hackers trying to go legit by exposing other hackers, etc.

I have to have three layers of hardware encrypted firewall between my LAN and WAN because of all my technically savy enemies. You see, I used to be internet cop.

by Alfie The Horndog September 4, 2005