My grand-dad thinks he's making his point more effectively
when he kicks on that capslock button.
Boomer font, baby!
when he kicks on that capslock button.
Boomer font, baby!
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. August 13, 2023
a heavy handwoven reversible textile used for hangings, curtains, and upholstery and characterized by complicated pictorial designs, and covered in dried semen. A fapestry is usually the result of someone fapping onto the same tapestry over a long period of time until it becomes rigid enough to throw like a big square frisbee.
"I wouldn't lean up against the thing on my wall, there bro - it's got my baby batter all over it."
"What the fuck? Why didn't you warn me this thing was a fapestry before I put my hand on it?!?"
"What the fuck? Why didn't you warn me this thing was a fapestry before I put my hand on it?!?"
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. October 10, 2011
An alternate term for resin; specifically, the resin left behind on smoking paraphernalia as a by-product of cannabinoid consumption.
In desperate times, Dangus often found himself smoking poor man's hash off of old pipe screens as ghetto wind chimes rang out in the distance, a sure sign that cracktivities were transpiring on the stinking streets of Memphis.
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. April 14, 2010
a nude photograph or video which is publicly shared online (most frequently by an ex-lover of the subject's) for the purpose of spiteful humiliation and/or the lulz.
While revenge porn has existed as long as the intarwebz itself, in early 2011 a rapidly-growing website called is anyone up appeared, providing a prominent and heavily viewed destination for those who seek such vengeance (or simply wish to view the results, or fap to them). The key element of this site is that it not only offers a place for revenge porn, but also links to the subjects' Facebook pages, thus increasing the lulz and/or humiliation factor exponentially.
As modern culture becomes more deeply immersed in digital technology, and as desperately horny homo sapiens continue to send each other home made fap material, rapid growth of the revenge porn industry seems all but inevitable. Additionally, from a legal standpoint (at least at the time of this writing), revenge porn is also virtually *unstoppable*, due to a legal loophole protecting the owner of any such website from criminal prosecution (see Section 230 of the Communications Decency Act of 1996).
This author's advice to all users of social media who have any concern for the confidentiality of their n00dz is, either don't share your pics with anyone or prepare your anus.
While revenge porn has existed as long as the intarwebz itself, in early 2011 a rapidly-growing website called is anyone up appeared, providing a prominent and heavily viewed destination for those who seek such vengeance (or simply wish to view the results, or fap to them). The key element of this site is that it not only offers a place for revenge porn, but also links to the subjects' Facebook pages, thus increasing the lulz and/or humiliation factor exponentially.
As modern culture becomes more deeply immersed in digital technology, and as desperately horny homo sapiens continue to send each other home made fap material, rapid growth of the revenge porn industry seems all but inevitable. Additionally, from a legal standpoint (at least at the time of this writing), revenge porn is also virtually *unstoppable*, due to a legal loophole protecting the owner of any such website from criminal prosecution (see Section 230 of the Communications Decency Act of 1996).
This author's advice to all users of social media who have any concern for the confidentiality of their n00dz is, either don't share your pics with anyone or prepare your anus.
Dude, is it true your crazy ex-fuckbuddy sent the cops to your house?
Yeah, that was some serious fucktardation...but there's always revenge porn.
Yeah, that was some serious fucktardation...but there's always revenge porn.
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. December 05, 2011
Did Charlie Sheen catch the booty cooties?
Nah man, I 'm pretty sure Charlie is winning in a different way...that dude got the needle cooties.
Nah man, I 'm pretty sure Charlie is winning in a different way...that dude got the needle cooties.
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. September 15, 2019
The practice of mixing odd flavors in the mouth simultaneously. Some examples of multitasting include eating a piece of citrus fruit too soon after brushing one's teeth, taking a hit off a beer while also chewing gum, or sucking on a breath mint while eating a wasabi-laden sushi roll.
While it is most often a manifestation of absent-mindedness, multitasting has also been deliberately practiced by people who 'just don't give a fuck.' These brave intentional multitasters have inspired humanity for generations innumerable. Kneel before Zod!
While it is most often a manifestation of absent-mindedness, multitasting has also been deliberately practiced by people who 'just don't give a fuck.' These brave intentional multitasters have inspired humanity for generations innumerable. Kneel before Zod!
Did you see that chick? She just popped a piece of gum in her mouth, chewed it like three times, and then downed half a diet soda. And now...I think...yes!...she's back to chewing the gum! What is this fucktardation?
That's called multitasting, and it is rather odd. But did you know that both the chewing gum and the soda contain a chemical poison called aspartame, which should never have been approved by the FDA?
No, do tell!
Well, it just so happens that Aspartame was passed despite FDA scientists' disapproval by none other than douche nozzle extraordinaire, Donald Rumsfeld.
According to a G.D. Searle's salesperson, Patty WoodAllott, Donald Rumsfeld stated "he would call in all his markers and that no matter what, he would see to it that aspartame be approved this year."
An interview with consumer attorney Jim Turner revealed how Donald Rumsfeld "called in his markers" as part of Reagan's transition team in 1981. This is why G.D. Searle felt compelled to reapply for aspartame's approval one day after Reagan's inauguration.
This is despite rejection of aspartame over brain tumors.
What a bunch of sweethearts, huh? I wish asshats Rumsfeld and that stupid band 311 would all go die in a fire.
That's called multitasting, and it is rather odd. But did you know that both the chewing gum and the soda contain a chemical poison called aspartame, which should never have been approved by the FDA?
No, do tell!
Well, it just so happens that Aspartame was passed despite FDA scientists' disapproval by none other than douche nozzle extraordinaire, Donald Rumsfeld.
According to a G.D. Searle's salesperson, Patty WoodAllott, Donald Rumsfeld stated "he would call in all his markers and that no matter what, he would see to it that aspartame be approved this year."
An interview with consumer attorney Jim Turner revealed how Donald Rumsfeld "called in his markers" as part of Reagan's transition team in 1981. This is why G.D. Searle felt compelled to reapply for aspartame's approval one day after Reagan's inauguration.
This is despite rejection of aspartame over brain tumors.
What a bunch of sweethearts, huh? I wish asshats Rumsfeld and that stupid band 311 would all go die in a fire.
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. May 23, 2010
An awkward way to say 'killed' without saying it.
Spawned by self-censoring people on social media sites
who do not wish to face bot-consequences for using such a terrible word.
Spawned by self-censoring people on social media sites
who do not wish to face bot-consequences for using such a terrible word.
They say Jeffrey Epstein unalived himself, but let's be real for a minute.
12,300 children were killed in Gaza between October 2023 and February 2024,
but rather than stop a genocide,
we must police language and say that these kids were 'unalived'.
12,300 children were killed in Gaza between October 2023 and February 2024,
but rather than stop a genocide,
we must police language and say that these kids were 'unalived'.
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. June 05, 2024