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The utopia of asses. The one land all ass-warriors strive for when their time comes to an end. Only glory and butts await for the brave and bold in this golden heaven.
"He fell unconscious after touching such perfect ass. He knew that after such experience he could only await death, and hoped that he was worthy of ascending to Assgard with full honours."
Assgard by Jefedin January 5, 2014
Urban Dictionary Merch
The anal equivalent of a "VCard". One keeps their Asscard until penetrated anally.
"So last night during sex, Jim took my asscard by sticking his fingers inside my anus"
Asscard by WindowDominos March 7, 2010
Related Words
Ass nard asstard Assgard Assward Asscard assnado assnerd assard Assnad assnarc
A male who goes around causing unnecessary drama, usually involving younger girls, particularly freshmen. As a self-proclaimed "Ladies Man (see Definition 3," an asstard typically spends a superfluous amount of time attempting to make himself look good for his company. This includes ridiculously expensive boy perfume, several cans of Axe(TM) deodorant, and driving a "tough" car without any regard to safety. (see car accident.) Additionally, an asstard tends to attempt to flatter other men and "impress" them with his own perceived "strength/coolness." Not only is this ineffective and hilarious, it also puts an asstard's sexuality into intense scrutiny. This is compounded by the fact that asstards are usually caught creeping and staring at younger men in bathrooms.
Prima: Who's that junior who only hangs out with freshmen?
Secunda: Who, him? Oh that's just Asstard, that's just how he rolls.
Prima: Haha, what a tool.

An Asstard is the synthesis of Asshole and Retard
Asstard by SeptemberLove December 18, 2010
The cross between a Retard and a Dumbass
A: Jimmy is an asstard for jumping on the fence nuts first.

B: I swear Bryan acts like an asstard sometimes.
Asstard by The_Random_Man May 10, 2014
The cross between a Retard and a Dumbass
A: Jimmy is an asstard for jumping on the fence nuts first.

B: I swear Bryan acts like an asstard sometimes.
Asstard by The_Random_Man May 13, 2014

Asstardia 

1. A planet not known to common earthlings where Asstards reside

2. A mental state of total ignorance and bliss

3. A group message where people talk about their messed up lives
Let's go to Asstardia
I have achieved Asstardia
I ranted about my mouth on Asstardia
Not just an ass, not just a retard. And asstard
dmi is a silly russian asstard.
asstard by ASDFGASD December 17, 2002
More from Urban Dictionary
A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.
Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.
Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026
Word of the Day on September 23, 2026

murderhobo 

In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.

The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.
DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.
murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021
Word of the Day on September 22, 2026
In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.
"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."
Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020
Word of the Day on September 21, 2026

Concrete cowboy 

A guy who thinks he's a country kinda guy, but in reality lives a comfortable city / suburban life.
Eugene: Look at that dude in the cowboy hat!
Todd: He's just a concrete cowboy.
Word of the Day on September 20, 2026
any hard liquor that is cheap & potent.. eg. relska, popov, potters, evan williams, kamchatka, fireball, rumpleminze, southern comfort, everclear
hey let's get a drink of that?

go ahead
*takes drink* ugh wtf is that?

everclear & bepsi
fucking hobo loko eeessshh
hobo loko by d i z k o 2 0 8 September 14, 2026
Word of the Day on September 19, 2026

God Shot 

A chance happening with profound meaning, an unexpected blessing, a "sign".
Dr. Drew on Celebrity Rehab said "All of a sudden what had been just another Hollywood proposal became for him an unexpected blessing, an opportunity for growth. In drug recovery language, that's called a "God shot."
God Shot by Imogen1564 February 25, 2011
Word of the Day on September 18, 2026

city chicken 

A food native to Pittsburgh/Western Pennsylvania in which cubes of pork and/or veal are put on a short, wooden skewer, breaded, then baked and/or fried.

I've heard that city chicken originated during the Great Depression, when folks didn't have enough money to buy full cuts of meat, so they assembled meat scraps on a wooden skewer, creating a make-shift drumstick. Hence the name.
Are yinz havin' city chicken for dinner?
city chicken by TRF August 31, 2006
Word of the Day on September 17, 2026
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