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petty thief 

Someone who steals for petty reasons, which technically is theft in general, because any authentic justification of theft would disqualify it as theft.

A "real thief" is theoretically, according to this logic, someone who only steals from petty thieves. But a petty thief is just as capable in principal of stealing from a "real thief".
Which one of y'all is the petty thief that just stole my cigarette butt?
petty thief by catholicbooty August 26, 2018

grand petty theft 

the act of stealing a large amount of inexpensive things
Johnny stole 5,000 Baby Ruth bars last night--that's a grand petty theft if I've ever seen one!
grand petty theft by papa lech March 2, 2010

Potty thief 

Someone who committed the crime in which the fecal matter of another is intentionally and fraudulently taken without permission or consent, with the intent to convert it to the taker's use (including potential sale).
"Barry Mc. Hawk was charged with potty theft in connection with the reported loss last month from a local households' bathroom. He is now, a Potty thief.
Potty thief by Silenced Guilt December 14, 2014

bash and dash with petty theft

When one engages in a bash and dash and upon leaving they exit with the hosts house cat or small dog.
Shane was so horrible in bed that while making her leave, Nancy grabbed his beautiful cat, Chuckles performing a picture perfect bash and dash with petty theft.

sans sheriff 

Lawless use of fonts or typography, with no regard to aesthetics or legibility
I'm putting this CV straight in the bin. Written totally sans sheriff.
sans sheriff by Jamarley July 3, 2019

Breadhead 

Someone who is addicted to obtaining money and building wealth. A money addict and fanatic. Breadheads often work more than one full-time job, and some even participate in illicit activities to "obtain the bread".
A breadhead is like a crackhead, but for money instead of crack.
Breadhead by 🅱️ U S 3 4 8 March 30, 2022