An elderly homosexual pervert from Springfield, MA. He is obsessed with "pig fucking" and semen, he is very well-endowed, and he often calls random people in order to engage them in explicitly sexual conversations.
What you get once you complete 12 years of religious schooling, allowing you to spend the rest of your lifeexploring all of the things your education repressed.
"Man, she showed me how to do some things I never even imagined. Where has she been all of my life."
Herbert the Pervert: Hey young fella. Do you like popsicles?
Idiot Boy: Yes
Herbert: I got a whole freezer full of them down in my cellar. Do you want to come down there with me?
Idiot Boy: Uh no thank you Mr. Herbert (leaves)
Herbert: Get your fat ass back here boy