A sex act. Performed by wrapping your penis in a banana peel and squeezing the juice of an orange, a lime, and a grapefruit on top. Your partner then gives you head as you lay sideways on a flat surface, ideally with the curviture of your penis lining up with their throat.
"My lady wanted something tropical, so I gave her a horizontal fruit-basket"

"How thoughtful!"
by Sassy yet Classy April 17, 2016
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When you and yo bitch laying down and you fuck her in the ass and jizz while you have crabs.
Me and my girl did the horizontal crab cake now she refuses to talk to cause of all the creams she had buy from the doctor.
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Sex (when experienced with all parties at a less than vertical position).

Also a killer latter day song by Blondie.
Last night Nikki invited me in to do the Horizontal Twist if you know what mean.
by ApricotFields October 8, 2020
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When both parties are making retarded faces at one another, while simultaneously having sex in the missionary position.
Bae, Horizontal Shortbus and chill?

My boyfriend only ever wants to do the horizontal shortbus with me.
by Desi Dukes July 9, 2017
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A.k.a. "moocher's greeting" or "glad-handout"; it refers to where one of your "friends" beamingly approaches you with extended arm as if to greet you with a hearty palm-clasp, but instead of positioning his hand vertically the way one usually does when shaking hands, he holds his outstretched palm **upwards** so that his hand is horizontal --- this "gimme, gimme, gimme" position is how his hand is usually held whenever he is around fellow humans (duh!).
I always feel suspicious whenever someone greets me with a horizontal handshake, since it is a good indication that he is planning to ask me for a handout.
by QuacksO August 3, 2019
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horizontal lengthage (ˌhôrəˈzän(t)l / leNG(k)TH / ij) : The amount of distance you gain in a single instance on a horizontal axis (can be applied in the air) (applies to melee and ranged weapons as well as projectiles)

Some people could say that this is a synonym of ''range''
Oh my god dude! Did you see the amount of horizontal lengthage I just got from that!
Wow dude! That horizontal lengthage was crazy!
Doomfist's Seismic Slam ability from OverWatch can get an impressive amount of horizontal lengthage .
Did you see the horizontal lengthage on this flail!?
by JokerGoat September 24, 2018
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N: a synonym for sex life. More commonly used for women who more commonly lay horizontally during sex.
"Did you read Chelsea Handler's book My Horizontal Life? It's a collection of her one night stands"
by jembert January 7, 2010
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