dick in a dick 

One man inserting his penis into another man's peehole.

The holy grail of creepy internet porn.

dick in a dick...someday perhaps I will find it...

dick in a dick by abw123 February 22, 2009

A spare dick in a fucking contest 

To describe a someone who gives little or no contribution to a task.

"Jenny didn't help at all, she just stood around like a spare dick in a fucking contest"

A spare dick in a fucking contest by hteb78 April 29, 2013

Dick in a Blender

A truly painful experience that still may be preferred over the proposed task, activity, action, etc.

Guy 1: Hey man, wanna go hang out at Bill's?
Guy 2: I'd rather shove my dick in a blender
Guy 1: I knew you didn't like Bill but that's extreme.
Guy 2: I beg to differ *plugs in blender*

Dick in a Blender by I Don't Need a Pseudonym September 10, 2014

dick in a box 

What to get that special lady in your life for Christmas. It's not a diamond ring, it's not a fancy car, and it's not a house in the hills. It's a dick in a box.

Step 1: cut a hole in a box
Step 2: put your junk in that box
Step 3: make her open the box

girl: i can't wait to see what you got me for christmas
guy: me either
girl: is it what i've always wanted?
guy: yup
girl: ok i'm ready
guy: merry christmas
girl: what is it?
guy: it's a dick in a box

dick in a box by caffeine21 December 23, 2006

Dick in a Jar 

A male platonic companion that a young, attractive woman keeps around to feel better about herself. The Dick in a Jar is stable, friendly, sensitive and nonthreatening. He is infatuated with her, but she sees him as a brother -- a brother with whom she cuddles while watching movies and complaining about the latest alpha male to break her heart. The Dick in a Jar secretly awaits his female companion's revelation that emotionally abusive fucktards will never make her happy and that he is actually the man of her dreams, but he waits in vain.

Mark: So, what's up with your roommate and that dorky guy who always spends the night? Are they bumpin' uglies?

Shauna: Naah, he's just her Dick in a Jar.

Dick in a Jar by Pavlov's Cat February 20, 2011

I put my dick in a bag of Doritos 

A kids mom died so he made a song but it started of with I put my dick in a bag of Doritos.

Johnny: I put my dick in a bag of Doritos

I put my dick in a bag of Doritos by Ohhhhhhj December 4, 2019

dick in a box 

A present that a man may give to his girl friend. It is ill advised to give this gift unless you are as cool/cooler than Justin Timberlake. That way, if the girl doesn't like it, she can always find solace in the fact that you're cooler than Justin Timberlake, who is pretty cool in his own right.

Average Joe: Here I got this for you.
Girl: What is that?!? Is that your dick in a box? That is gross.
Average Joe: Why can't I be as cool as JT?!?!?!?!?!

dick in a box by Yorf February 1, 2007