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Chocolate Jesus 

A formed chocolate bar in the shape of the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ
I gave that self rightious preachy fat bitch a chocolate Jesus for Christmas. She loved it and then ate Christ's head.

chocolate jesus 

Similar to the filthy Sanchez but with one major difference. After you've engaged in anal sex you don't just draw the mustache, you give them the full beard.
I gave your sister the chocolate Jesus last night.

Really, how'd she take it?

I don't remember cause after i left i got struck by lightning.

Chocolate Jesus 

Other than the name of the Tom Waits song a chocolate Jesus is the sexual act of shitting in someones mouth and they die of e. coli poisoning and you hope they come back three days later.
I tried the Chocolate Jesus on Carol the other day and I went to the tomb and the stone was still there. I guess she isn't a Choclate Jesus.
Chocolate Jesus by Captain Donald November 1, 2010

sweet chocolate jesus

An act committed during sex when a man will pull his cock out of the ass of the partner, turn them around so that they are kneeling, facing him, then dab the face with poo lightly three times saying "Father, Son and the holy ghost" followed by a hard cock slap to knock the rest of the shit off.
He annointed her with a Sweet chocolate jesus and thus purged himself of the sin of feces.