I want to describe for you my Ideal Woman. My Ideal Woman has slim hips, powerful thighs, sinewy calves, a narrow waist, a flat stomach with taut lines of muscle, a broad, powerful chest, wide shoulders, bulging biceps, jack-hammer-like forearms, a bull-like neck, and a drooping, veined pecker with a livid, velvety fire-helmet top — an opalescent drop of pre-cum winking at the droop-lipped meatus slit — and two pendulous balls heavy with hot bloatum. Call me a dreamer, if you will, but I believe my Ideal Woman is out there, somewhere, and I’m not going to stop looking until I find her.
by J.Shorten May 15, 2008
Get the bloatum mug.Bloatmaxing describes a health and fitness movement founded by the great Bloatlord Grizzly Kyriakos from Greece. A proper bloatmax training regiment includes heavy sitting zercher front raises, walking training, ellbow training and lowkick training. An important aspect of the bloatmax lifestyle is the intimidation of twinks. Noteable followers of the bloatmax lifestyle include grizzly jr., Jason "the monster" blaha and Janoy Cresva. To archieve the bloatmaxed physique it is necessary to eat a high sodium diet.
by 8buckcuck September 19, 2018
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bloatum
• bloatmeal
• Bloagumpkin
• bloatmaxing
• bloatmaxxing
• bloatmobile
• bloatmonger
• bloatmotional
• bloatus
• Chodious Bloatus
a motor vehicle of excessive size and weight for its intended purpose; any vehicle that is far larger than it needs to be.
My minivan was okay when I was hauling a large family around, but for solo commuting it's a bloatmobile.
by Carlos el Gato June 17, 2009
Get the bloatmobile mug.by Mark2020 January 3, 2019
Get the Bloatmeal mug.A mixture of Bloagie and Blumpkin: When you are eating a hoagie while taking a shit and getting your dick sucked.
Dude: Why is the toilet clogged?
Bro: This chick was giving me a bloagumpkin last night and I dropped the hoagie in the toilet. My shit and hoagie was too much for the shitter to handle.
Bro: This chick was giving me a bloagumpkin last night and I dropped the hoagie in the toilet. My shit and hoagie was too much for the shitter to handle.
by Pope Awesome the 1st May 25, 2011
Get the Bloagumpkin mug.by BRAVO_ February 8, 2018
Get the Chodious Bloatus mug.An absolutely huge ball sack, round and plump to the point of nearly exploding, similar to a bloated stomach. Often veiny and riddled with shallow wrinkle lines, in extreme cases it resembles a beach ball from the 1960's, overly inflated to the point of bursting. Usually smells like a cross between undercooked pork and horse hoof.
He mistakenly put his bloatus in my face, thinking I'd be able to get that huge stinking sack of potatoes in my mouth.
by woody slutfree October 19, 2010
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