blarping 

Blarping occurs when someone discloses a lot of personal information without consideration to the interest or comfort of the person listening. Typically it is emotionally uncomfortable or even traumatic content which can overwhelm the person they are blarping at.

It is a way of unconsciously infecting another person with the overwhelming feelings and horror we pretend to ourselves doesn't exist.

Wow, this person has been blarping at me for 5 minutes. I can no longer politely sit by while my soul is crushed under the weight of their crazy. I'd suggest therapy, but the therapist may kill themselves if they had to listen to this for a whole hour.

blarping by kevinbeal December 14, 2015

Blarting 

The act of attempting to finger someone with your foot whilst watching Paul Blart Mall Cop, starring Kevin James as the titular mild-mannered security guard who must save the day when his shopping mall is taken over by a gang of organised crooks.

"omg becky, i cant believe dinosaur cum boy blarted me last night"

"eww blarting is so gross, at least he didn't grown ups 2 (featuring adam sandler, kevin james, chris rock and david spade) you like connor did to me the other night"

Blarting by Xx_blarter_xX December 26, 2021

Happy Blapping 

Similar to happy slapping buy instead of being slapped by the hand the victim is slapped by a penis.

Bob: "Want to go happy blapping Dave?"
Dave: "Im always up for a bit of happy blapping Bob, I'll go get my camera phone"

Happy Blapping by Ikswokzseim August 7, 2006

Sharticle blapping 

When a partial shart occurs whilst in the process of blapping.

Can't believe I partially sharted while I was blapping my mrs last nite!! Sharticle Blapping was such a shocker!

Sharticle blapping by Squapstars October 16, 2011

Blarphing 

When your getting a blow job and you get so relaxed that you accidentally fart in her mouth.

Dude she was giving me such good head I kept Blarphing in her mouth.

Blarphing by HonkeyDonkeyDoo May 22, 2017

blarting 

To cry your eyes out

"Stop blarting, little Johnny!"

blarting by Mandy Robinson June 9, 2005

blarting 

The act of falling down when overweight. This is popularised by Paul Blart, the Mall Cop, as he falls down in each movie for at least 5+ times. TL:DR Fat man go boom-boom.

Oh dear, Paul is always blarting all over the place! He just blarted right there in the ball at work. It never stops.

blarting by MertK October 23, 2016