Wooden spoon

A person can be referred to as a "wooden spoon" when he or she makes it their mission to stir shit left, right and center, usually by spreading lies and false rumours about others.

John: Hey, you seem to be quite upset. What's going on?
Jane: I'm furious. My sister keeps telling lies about me and my boyfriend won't even talk to me.
John: Nah, don't worry about her. She's just a wooden spoon. She'll get what's coming for her when people realise the truth.

by Bluerain12ya November 25, 2016

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wooden spoon

The number one cause of disciplined children all over the world. (Though mainly of Portuguese descent) The wooden spoon is a dangerous weapon capable of ending the tantrum of even the most stubborn child.

No, mom! Not the wooden spoon! No I promise I won't throw anymore pipe bombs!

by CriticalDesign April 09, 2008

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Wooden Spoon

A wooden spoon is a spoon that is used for stirring sauces and for mixing ingredients in cooking. It is made of wood and has a long handle. Not to be used to beat your children.

Person A: Man, my mom made some killer soup last night with a Wooden Spoon, and later used it to beat the shit out of me.
Person B: …That’s rough buddy.

by hydrateordiestraight January 02, 2022

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wooden spoon

A situation where a man is spooning a woman, and suddenly has an erection, in effect poking her in her rear. This is more common in the morning hours and is usually involuntary: essentially popping morning wood while spooning.

Steph was unpleasantly surprised to be awakened by the wooden spoon.

by hack314 February 13, 2007

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