Went to Jared 

is cheap and/or has poor or unsophisticated taste in jewelry

"Uhhh... Are you wearing my engagement ring!?"
"No, this one is mine."
"Oh. Sorry, the look exactly alike, did your fiance...?"
"Yeah, he went to Jared." *Sigh*
"Mine too."

Went to Jared by engender February 7, 2010

Went to Jared 

Dying. So coined because married life (which is what huge diamonds are about) and death are nearly identical.

"HE WENT TO JARED?!"
"Yeah, he stepped in front of a car... I'm really sorry."

Went to Jared by Black Ships December 22, 2008

He went to Jared 

An annoying phrase that will NOT catch on, so shut up.

On a poorly written commercial with bad actors...

Girlfran #1: OMG Gurrrl He went to Jared!
Girlfran #2: What?
Girlfran #1: Gurrrl! He went to Jared! He bought me diamonds!
Girlfran #2: Is that some attempted universal symbol for proposing? If it is then it's retarded and isn't going to catch on. In fact I doubt that people who actually got stuff from there say that. So shut up.
Girlfran #1: ...

He went to Jared by jkbena612 December 21, 2009