The Hobbs Tree is a curious sexual endeavour originating on the southern coast of England. Usually performed by men with unfortunate hairlines and terrible comb-overs, upon their unwitting, and soon to be damaged girlfriends. The male, after a healthy and indeed sloppy helping of foreplay, places their face within their female's vagina, who should be placed on her shoulders facing upwards with her legs akimbo at a 180 degree angle. Upon the disappearance of the face, all that will be visible is the sparse locks of curly, combed over hair, now nestled between two outstretched legs, like the leaves and branches of a tree.
I know me got no hair. But it mean me and julie can do The Hobbs Tree every night, me love the taste of me julie.
by bencurryy May 3, 2022