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The guillotine

A 'practical joke' that involves lifting the seat of a toilet, and intricately defecating on the front lip of the bowl. You then delicately place the toilet seat on top on the freshly laid nugget, and evacuate the stall.

Ideally, your intended victim will come along to enjoy their peaceful abulution, drop their pants and proceed to sit down.

The result of their bodyweight on the toilet seat will sever a section of turd and eject it like Mary Antoinette's head into the victims awaiting pants.

Everything going to plan, you will have successfully shat in someone's pantaloons while they are wearing them. And probably irrevocably burned any bridges of friendship in the process.
Mark laid the guillotine in the camps mess toilet. Now they have taken all the seats away since we clearly can't be trusted.
by C Spiceyweiner June 12, 2018
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The guillotine

A 'practical joke' that involves lifting the seat of a toilet, and intricately defecating on the front lip of the bowl. You then delicately place the toilet seat on top on the freshly laid nugget, and evacuate the stall.

Ideally, your intended victim will come along to enjoy their peaceful ablution, drop their pants and proceed to sit down.

The result of their body weight on the toilet seat will sever a section of turd and eject it like Mary Antoinette's head into the victims awaiting pants.

Everything going to plan, you will have successfully shat in someone's pantaloons while they are wearing them. And probably irrevocably burned any bridges of friendship in the process.
Mark laid the guillotine in the camps mess toilet. Now they have taken all the seats away since we clearly can't be trusted.
by C Spiceyweiner June 13, 2018
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The Guillotine

When you French kiss your girl and uppercut her jaw
"Yo james I hit my girl with "The Guillotine"
"Oh shit yeah todd"
by Fozzagain June 7, 2019
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The Guillotine

What we're all going to write in if the major political parties don't start putting up better candidates.
"Which of these morons do you think is the lesser of two evils?"
"No, didn't you hear? We're all going to write in The Guillotine to send a message that we're sick and tired of this shit."
by Publius0987 August 9, 2025
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get the guillotine!

saying you use when a girl has a hot body but a nasty face.
"Oh shit, that girl is hot"
-then the face is revealed
"aaaaaaaah, get the guillotine!"
by longschlong silver April 12, 2003
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double bubble disco queen headed to the guillotine

someone who has no idea what is going on when close to being faced with punishment
"Hey, did you see Greg yesterday? He punched the police chief."
"Well, he's a double bubble disco queen headed to the guillotine."
by xraybloom May 27, 2022
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The Oral Guillotine sprinkler

it's a super kinky and fun for the whole family, sex move

you sit on the ground with your legs spread sitting up right, have the girl lie on the ground like a bear rug, with your dick in her mouth; as you're about to climax have a buddy curb stomp on her head, slamming down her head so that it cuts off your penis. as you're ejaculating, your blood and cum will mix and shoot out at high speeds covering where ever you are in bloody cum! As for your penis? well that's a meal or souvenir for her to keep.
The Oral Guillotine Sprinkler is a super kinky sex move

Bro, she was so into me she even Oral Guillotine sprinkler ed me.
whoa bro, you did it, and didn't ask me to curb stomp her for you?
sorry homie but I had to ask my neighbour, he was the closest at the time.
that's reasonable.
by SimonTheMemeDealer January 2, 2020
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