This is when a crap is taking a long time, you get the paper ready and use it to blow your nose while you wait. Then you forget and when you wipe your ass with it it doesnt actually absorb anything. It just smears everything in a big mess round your hole, needing further cleaning with soap.
Oh my god sorry i took so long I dont want to put you off your dinner but i got the paper ready and then i used it to blow my nose then i wiped my ass with it but it didnt actually absorb anything it just smeared everything in a big mess and i had to clean up in the sink it was a distinct case of snottybotty .
Fogey/fogy /fougi/ sl. (early 18C+, orig. Scot) old-fashioned, stuck-in-the mud.
Person with old fashioned ideas which he is unwilling to change: Come to the disco and stop being such an old fogey!
You think me an old fogeyand an old tory, his thoughtful voice said. I saw three generations since O’Connel’s time. I remember the famine. Do you know that the orange lodges agitated for repeal of the union twenty years before O’Connel did or before the prelates of your communion denounced him as a demagogue? You fenians forget some things. (James Joyce, Ulysses. Penguin Books,1992. p. 38)