At Destin for the 4th, an all day drinking binge results in your friend, Dallas, who is smeaged, disappearing. At about 5am when most others are passed out for the night, your smeaged friend is still going strong, talking to random folks about Lynyrd Skynyrd and Auburn football. The smeaged friend then passes out on a beach float in someone's driveway.

Bro since I got dirtpilled on Tuesday I have made sooo many worm friends and made them soo many little houses to get married in. Me? Lonely? No you’re the lonely one u lawn owning freak

Man: What did you do Saturday Night
Your Daughter: I was smeaged motherfucker
Man: Were you hung over
Your Daughter obvi