Poke-in-the-eye

A breakfast treat!

Take a slice of white bread, fold in half. Take a bite out of the middle. Unfold. You should be left with a square of bread, but with a round hole in the centre. (If not, see a dentist, or the bedside glass where you put your false teeth...).
Fry in the fat left by the sausages and bacon, whilst carefully breaking an egg in the 'poke'. Fry gently, then turn it.

Great with good quality sausages, bacon and grilled Portobello mushrooms. (Plus Heinz beans, fried tomatoes, grilled onion halves, partner, anything else that springs to mind)

Poke-in-the-eye
See definition.

Poke-in-the-eye by andycrofts December 15, 2011

better than a poke in the eye with a blunt stick 

Phrase describing a situation that isn't very good, but could be worse.

How was your holiday visiting your grandma?

Better than a poke in the eye with a blunt stick.

better than a poke in the eye with a blunt stick by Ryan Paine March 24, 2008

Better than a poke in the eye with a burnt stick 

Not bad.

Pier: How was last night's SSS?
Chappo: Better than a poke in the eye with a burnt stick.

Better than a poke in the eye with a burnt stick by Chappo January 20, 2004

A poke in the eye with a sharp stick 

The third choice in a series of options in which the first two have been rejected.

A: "I'm sorry your date cancelled. Do you want to go see a movie?"

B: (sulkily) "No."
A: "Want to go to the club?"

B: "No."
A: "Want a poke in the eye with a sharp stick?"

A poke in the eye with a sharp stick by bitteryoungwoman July 8, 2009

Better than a poke in the brown eye with a sharp dick 

Better than nothing.

God this buffet sucks.

Better than a poke in the brown eye with a sharp dick.

Better than a poke in the brown eye with a sharp dick by Shuaman December 30, 2021

Cheeks 

An Irish phrase meaning shit, derived from ass
(Not to be confused with the literal description of one's buttocks)

"Did you hear the song Aylek$ dropped?"
"Hardly. Her music is absolute cheeks."

"My boyfriend say LaFlame is cheeks."
"Tell your boyfriend I said it's his mixtape that's cheeks."

Cheeks by thecartisan April 26, 2020

sans sheriff 

Lawless use of fonts or typography, with no regard to aesthetics or legibility

I'm putting this CV straight in the bin. Written totally sans sheriff.

sans sheriff by Jamarley July 3, 2019