Ohio Turnpike

An expedient vehicle maneuver used when one needs to defecate immediately (typically a code brown diarrhea emergency) so one is forced to pull to the side of the road. Pull far enough off on the right shoulder and slightly angle the front of the car toward the road. Open the passenger door and no one can see you from in front or behind thus enabling the pooper to squat and lose his bowels in complete privacy.

Dude, I’m gonna’ shit myself! Pull an Ohio Turnpike NOW!!!!!

Ohio Turnpike by MagsMcGavin June 2, 2018

Ohio Turnpike

This tricky roadside position is an Ohio favorite! It invovles the driver and 3 passengers in to satisfy the criterion to complete a "suck-cessful" Ohio Turnpike. The most basic version of this sexy drive-by deviancy, proudly founded by a 20 yr. old Ohio woman, allows each member of the road trip to be pleasured simultaneously. The role of the driver is the trickiest part, as he/she has to focus on staying on the road while doing the "reach-behind" to the driver immediately behind them. The driver side passenger then has to orally suffice the other back seat passenger, while they do a reach around to the shot-gun passenger.

Perhaps the second most difficult part is the shotgun man/woman has to do oral on the driver without interfering with his/her driving operations. While seemingly challenging, this clever position proves that it truly is "hip to be square".... Or in one at least.

Kenny: "This road trip is sooo borring.... Ohio sucks."

Megan: "Wait a minute guys, Ohio is good for a lot of things, and I bet we could make this trip a lot better with some old fashioned fun, The Ohio Turnpike."

Kenny: "Why.... what is that?"

Megan: "Well, I think it's best to learn by example."

Eddie: "Hmmm.... I don't like the sounds of this...."

Ohio Turnpike by holla@ya March 19, 2011

Ohio Turnpike

This tricky roadside position is an Ohio favorite! It invovles the driver and 3 passengers in to satisfy the criterion to complete a "suck-cessful" Ohio Turnpike. The most basic version of this sexy drive-by deviancy, proudly founded by the historic Byrne family, allows each member of the road trip to be pleasured simultaneously. The role of the driver is the trickiest part, as he/she has to focus on staying on the road while doing the "reach-behind" to the driver immediately behind them. The driver side passenger then has to orally suffice the other back seat passenger, while they do a reach around to the shot-gun passenger.

Perhaps the second most difficult part is the shotgun man/woman has to do oral on the driver without interfering with his/her driving operations. While seemingly challenging, this clever position proves that it truly is "hip to be square".... Or in one at least.

Kenny: "This road trip is sooo borring.... Ohio sucks."

Megan: "Wait a minute guys, Ohio is good for a lot of things, and I bet we could make this trip a lot better with some old fashioned fun, The Ohio Turnpike."

Kenny: "Why.... what is that?"

Megan: "Well, I think it's best to learn by example."

Eddie: "Hmmm.... I don't like the sounds of this...."

Ohio Turnpike by holla@ya March 18, 2011