Neds are people who speak slang ,wear track suits, often lacoste. female neds: wear a foundaition a few times darker than there natural skintone resulting in an orange appearance.neds tend to wear a vast amount of common cheap gold jewellery. Neds r closely associated with chavs and bams.
neds can often be found loitering in parks under bridges or in other quiet and iscolated places drinking bucky/buckfast or cider and smoking. Neds often form gangs for there area they arrange fights with other gangs for no apparent reason. police hate neds and innocent people are often mistaken for neds , resulting in great hatred for the neds of glasgow and other areas.
neds can often be found loitering in parks under bridges or in other quiet and iscolated places drinking bucky/buckfast or cider and smoking. Neds often form gangs for there area they arrange fights with other gangs for no apparent reason. police hate neds and innocent people are often mistaken for neds , resulting in great hatred for the neds of glasgow and other areas.
ned1: awrite mate want tae go doon tae the shop the nite n gee sum bucky n that coz a heavey need a booze.
ned2: aye sound mate, want tae gee sum maddog n'all, gonnae be a pure buzz the nite.
ned1: aye mate am off tae meet ma burd catch'ye
ned2: aye sound mate, want tae gee sum maddog n'all, gonnae be a pure buzz the nite.
ned1: aye mate am off tae meet ma burd catch'ye
by ned hater Gr July 7, 2005
Irritating, overly-confident, arrogant, uneducated Street Monkey, indigenous to Scotland and much much harder than the english chavs.
Males are usually found wearing Ned Tartan Caps (Burberry)and brightly coloured Shellsuits. Their habitat usually includes off-licenses that sell Buckfast (or a "Bottle of Whit the fuck ye gawking at, ya bawbag" as it is locally known) Their IQ is usually around five points short of a cannibis plant, which they smoke consistantly in a vain hope of increasing intelligence. They tend to hunt in packs or 10-20 and can be menancing to the rest of the general public - Although if you lamp the gobbiest wee shite amongst them and the pituitary retard (6'4" at 14 years old) then generally they run away making baboon noises and disappear into the undergrowth for a couple of hours. The male communicates with other males in grunts, farts and burps and simple phrases like "Gie's a swally o yer bucky man" and "check the airse on thon wee hairy" which are about the limit of speech their education allows.
The female of the species is defined by the wobble of lard which cocoons her body and this is only held in place by here over-stretched thong and too small bra. Most of the females will be pregnant before the age of sixteen unless the nedette is in Dundee when she will be pregnant by 13 years old. The females are like magpies in that they like things which are shiny and will marry their male ned for the price of a £19.99 ring from Elizabeth Duke's in Argos even if it causes their fingers to turn green.
Alternatively if the male ned is simply "Wantin his hole" then all he has to do is purchase or steal a 3 litre bottle of Frosty Jack's Chemical - never seen an apple - Cider which when placed in the line of sight of a nedette causes her lard to burst her thong and for her legs to spread rapidly even before he offers her a swally..
Males are usually found wearing Ned Tartan Caps (Burberry)and brightly coloured Shellsuits. Their habitat usually includes off-licenses that sell Buckfast (or a "Bottle of Whit the fuck ye gawking at, ya bawbag" as it is locally known) Their IQ is usually around five points short of a cannibis plant, which they smoke consistantly in a vain hope of increasing intelligence. They tend to hunt in packs or 10-20 and can be menancing to the rest of the general public - Although if you lamp the gobbiest wee shite amongst them and the pituitary retard (6'4" at 14 years old) then generally they run away making baboon noises and disappear into the undergrowth for a couple of hours. The male communicates with other males in grunts, farts and burps and simple phrases like "Gie's a swally o yer bucky man" and "check the airse on thon wee hairy" which are about the limit of speech their education allows.
The female of the species is defined by the wobble of lard which cocoons her body and this is only held in place by here over-stretched thong and too small bra. Most of the females will be pregnant before the age of sixteen unless the nedette is in Dundee when she will be pregnant by 13 years old. The females are like magpies in that they like things which are shiny and will marry their male ned for the price of a £19.99 ring from Elizabeth Duke's in Argos even if it causes their fingers to turn green.
Alternatively if the male ned is simply "Wantin his hole" then all he has to do is purchase or steal a 3 litre bottle of Frosty Jack's Chemical - never seen an apple - Cider which when placed in the line of sight of a nedette causes her lard to burst her thong and for her legs to spread rapidly even before he offers her a swally..
Examples of neds can be found outside any off-licence in Scotland for the males and outside the nurseries at home time for the females
by Gypsy Laird April 2, 2008
A Scottish term for the often uneducated and invariably aggressive teenagers found throughout Britain. Identified by gold jewellery (especially sovereign rings), baseball caps, white trainers and/or Kappa/Burberry branded clothing. The name is thought to derive from 'Edward', as in teddy boy. It is in no way an acronym for "non-educated delinquent", which is in any case ungrammatical.
by Potatojunkie February 7, 2005
A young spotty unemployed shellsuit wearing tink, who thinks thunderbird is a drink for posh people, his ambition is to go to jail and offend as many normal people as possible, the highlight of his week is giro day or slashing someone at the weekend, scared to look at you on his own, but thinks he is hard as fuck in a group of 20 other neds, picks fag buts from the street and hassles people for spare change.
by Paul January 14, 2004
a general wee prick who will pick fights with those who are differant when in large groups. when alone a ned will shit his trackies and run.
last week a wee ned whop started on me happened to get stuck in an elevator on his own the front of my new rocks are now permanantly broken thanks to his thick skull.
clean the streets kill a ned
join the a.a.n army against neds
clean the streets kill a ned
join the a.a.n army against neds
by <---Azriel---> July 14, 2006
Neds, much to the contrary of common belief, are not purely found within the Glasgow area, but litter most parks and wooded areas of Scotland drinking "Buckfast" and other get-pissed-quick drinks. The word "ned" does not stand for "non-educated-delinquent" as nowadays, neds can range from the educated to the idiots. Mainly, they are idiots. Neds do wear tracksuits and trainers and caps tilted very high upwards and gold rings. The Female ned, however, can be identified in two forms, The Manly Nedette and the Nedette. The nedette can also be known as a "Slut" "whore" or "person wearing very few clothes and lots of gold jewlery". The Manly Nedette is a female who wears tracksuits and trainers and caps tilted very high upwards and gold rings. A common trademark of the ned is trackies tucked into socks.
by girl from Stirling August 7, 2006
A type of thug in Scotland, their low level IQ doesn't allow them to understand much, not even activities that they claim to be experts on such as: fighting, drinking, drug-taking and cars (not that they can afford a car). The mass majority of these idiots are unemployed. So here's what clothes they wear: tracksuits. socks that are worn over the sleeves of the track bottoms, "gold" chains, one or two rings, white trainers and Rangers or Cetic football tops. They are normally in a group or should I say a "team" and they may have a ridiculous name for this team and they talk bollocks to other teams about how uneducated they all are, then start slicing and stabbing eachother with kitchen knives. Neds can make an aftershave or a deodorant smell like feces, mainly because they bath in these fragrances (not to imply these brainless tinks actually wash themselves) and put way too much on, their breathe stinks and clearly neds don't brush their teeth. Neds act aggressive, because old ladies that have been victims of attacks from neds had convinced these neds that they are somewhat badass, which of course they aren't, they're all talk ... if you can even call what comes out their smelly mouths, 'talk'. As for alcohol consumption, mostly Buckfast tonic wine or VERY cheap beer and cider. Drugs: hash and maybe sniff glue they nicked from a primary school. Figure: skinny and rodent-like. IQ: 0-30 points. Neds are just a waste of space, air and money.
Ned: Hol you, wit ye dain growling at meh, tryin eh start sommit?
Person with an IQ above 75: Sorry, can I help you?
Ned: Ah wiz chillin ova there and ah caught ye out growling at meh
Person: Um, well I wasn't, now go away and fry a mars bar or something
Ned: WIT YE SAYIN TEH ME?
Person: Get a job
Person with an IQ above 75: Sorry, can I help you?
Ned: Ah wiz chillin ova there and ah caught ye out growling at meh
Person: Um, well I wasn't, now go away and fry a mars bar or something
Ned: WIT YE SAYIN TEH ME?
Person: Get a job
by brothelboy March 7, 2010