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Harpooon!!!

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What you yell when an annoying fatass comes your way or in your line of sight.
Fat albert walks by

Guy: Man the Harpooon!!!
by blackestwhitedude September 8, 2011
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1. (noun) Slang term for a penis usually used in the context of sexuality.

2. (noun) A pointed instrument thrown for distance in competitive sports similar to a javelin but is made of a viscous material and rarely sticks in the ground on impact. Much less popular than a wood harpoon or a steel harpoon. Can also be used in hunting but is rarely effective as it usually bounces off the animal being hunted.
1.

SMITTY: So? Would you throw Ugly Betty the ol' goo harpoon or what?
WAYNE: Naw, man. Not unless I had about ten beers in me.

2.

The Swedish athlete was disqualified because he tripped over his own goo harpoon.
by Mickey Nation December 14, 2008
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rusty harpoon

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When someone lays face down on the living room floor and then proceeds to aggressively sleepfinger their butthole.
Chad was so drunk that he gave himself a rusty harpoon.

While putting in his contacts in, Chad had the sudden and horrifying realization that he gave himself a rusty harpoon. Chad has pinkeye.
by SpaceJoshtin February 10, 2014
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Flesh Harpoon

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A lethal cock. One look at a flesh harpoon and a woman is instantly seduced into riding said harpoon for hours.
Stacy was being a prude holdout bitch so I had to whip out my flesh harpoon and pull her in for the kill.
by Lazynutz July 7, 2005
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The Alaskan Harpoon

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A Sex moved designed to make the normal unenjoyable experience of fucking a fat chick somewhat more bareable. The Alaskan Harpoon is preformed by post-forplay when already nude. The enlarged women must lay down across the bed spread eagle and the normal sized man must stand at the foot of the bed. (note-the following is the most important part of the process) Next the man must aim and when he is properly arranged he jumps. The penis of the man will land in the vagina of the girl if properly preformed. After jumping due to the excess body fat of the women the man will bounce, and thus the necessary movement for sexual intercoarse will be done absent of any effort fromt he man.
Used in an everyday conversation:

Paul: Yo Phil, did you here that John did that fat chick from accounting

Phil: Yeah

Paul: Thats such a shame, John is above that

Phil: Not Paul its all good, he gave her The Alaskan Harpoon

Paul: Oh ok thats better
by Scotie the great March 7, 2009
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"Me & Bobby Mcgee" (1st verse):
"Busted flat in Baton Rouge, headin' for the trains,
Feelin' nearly faded as my jeans.
Bobby thumbed a diesel down just before it rained,
Took us all the way to New Orleans.
Took my harpoon out of my dirty red bandana
And was blowin' sad while Bobby sang the blues,
With them windshield wipers slappin' time and
Bobby clappin' hands
We finally sang up every song that driver knew…"
by RC135 January 20, 2009
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Cuban Harpoon

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To cum in a persons month while receiving a blow job, while that person in turn spits your own cum back onto your dick and continues to suck you off.
A Cuban walks into a kitchen where he runs into his one night stands nymphomaniac roommate. Before he knows whats happening the nympho starts giving him a blow job. The Cuban was all about the blow job and was wondering if the nympho would spit or swallow. He was not expecting the nympho to spit his own cum back onto his dick and start sucking him off again (Cuban Harpoon).
by Skippy the Pirate or Bubbles September 7, 2009
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