Harpoontang; Verb; Latin in origin;
1) To hunt down the sloppiest, drunkest, and largest fat chick at a bar 2) To meaninglessly stalk a "BBW" in hopes of getting blackmail nudes, or a way to blind ones self.
"Oh DEAR GOD MIKE! I can't believe you tried to harpoontang that chick. I swear to god her rolls were 3 times the size of her tits. How the hell did you get her off her Rascal/other kind of scooter, to do the shagnasty with her?"
The art of seducing a mate that exceeds the weight limit of an F-350. Usually in reference to a woman considered a “whale”, you must inflate her ego, since the rest of her is already inflated. Jumping on a harpoontang grenade is the bravest and most loyal thing a friend can do.
My junkwill henceforth be known as Moby Dick, due to my harpoontang record.
-The act of successfully bringing home a woman equal to or greater than your own body weight in desperation at the end of a long drunken night of being rejected by more attractive and better-endowed women. After successfully completeting this task, a man will be granted his license to harpoon and may continue to indulge in this difficult task.
The greatest of harpooning feats is referred to as a moby dick
Kyle: Dude I boned a hottie last night.
Disgusted friend: MAN, she was a whale, but you've earned your harpooning license
Kyle:I wondered why she wanted the lights off