Luke: Hey did you hear that nick got an STD from natalie?
Carter: no. what did he get?

Luke: children.
by themexijew September 19, 2009
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Children are humans below 13. They are humans, but they aren't real, mature humans. 99% of all children are stupid, spoiled, and scream in stores. 1% can be found silently sitting in a coffee shop drinking coffee while reading a Richard Feynman book. Those are the gift ed, mentally mature kids. They don't have any awesome toy cars bought by their parents. They deserve to be respected, not stereotyped.Don't stereotype children, think about the 1% in the world!
To find out if a child is stupid, give them a Richard Feynman book. If they read it, and don't throw it away in 5 seconds while taking out their ultimate spiderman book, that means they are one of the 1% intellegent children. If they reject it, or throw it away in five seconds and take out their awesome spiderman comic book, they are stupid. Don't bother teaching them about newtons three laws of physics, they will be thinking about their awesome Wii game during that time.

If the children want toys, they can collect money from the sidewalk or become babysitter, since children cannot get a part time job.
Mommy, look, look! Can you get me this?
*Climbs on shelves out of curiosity*

Smart child: Do you have a Richard Feynman book?
*Gets Richard Feynman book*
by porn addiction November 26, 2009
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The most delicious food known to man. You can eat it raw or cook it anyway you want. But don’t worry! It’s not considered cannibalism if The child is under age 11. Don’t worry they are easy to find! Yummy yummy. They go down your tummy. And the may give you slight cramps. But it’s fine! Everything is fineeee.

(This is a complete joke oopsie)
Maria said”Yo dude have you been to that new restaurant I heard they serve the best children”
Alex replies, “no I prefer Toy R Us”
via giphy
by Awesomereads June 12, 2018
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The most stupid being on Earth.
Screams, farts, screams, cries, farts, vomits, farts.
They don't care about anyone.
Almost every child is spoiled.
~Children are so dumb..
~I know, right?
by Dogaahs April 17, 2016
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a derogatory term for someone under the age of 13 or something, though most assholes call people under 18 children. contrary to popular belief, children are the best form of human that has ever existed, due to their innocence, uninhibited creativity, friendliness, and irresistible humor. all children are born with large amounts of creativity and imagination, though society quickly hushes that away so they can become an ass-faced drone to keep the modern society alive. children are a blessing, as they have yet to be turned into temper-mental assholes because life keeps pissing on their faces. however, some children can keep their souls, seeing that society is only tearing them down, so they lift themselves up and realize that life is testing you, and if you know that EVERYTHING IS AWESOME, you will pass, and be happy until you die and transcend into glob-world.
Adult 1: ha! look at that child!
Adult 2: yeah, he can't do anything.
Child: *builds completely original and awesome thing out of LEGOs, completely showing up anything the adults had ever done in their lives*
Adult 1:... holy crap
Adult 2:... he's an adult in disguise!

Child: naw, I'm just better than you in every way. just like all the other children on the earth.
by A-person_yay February 19, 2014
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