Calvinitis 

A syndrome commonly associated with people who find the toilet a place to rush or be rushed upon, often leading to inadequate wiping or no wiping at all. This generally causes the smearage of dingleberries on, and around the anus.

'I was taking a shit when my phone rang, no time to wipe, left me with calvinitis for the rest of the day.'

Calvinitis by onearmninja March 4, 2009

Cayminitis 

An extremely contagious disease spread from a lack of Caymin (aka, most wonderful girl ever).

Symptoms include:
-slowing respiratory rate
-Decreased appetite and/or weight loss
-Restlessness, irritability
-Poor school performance
-Severe insomnia or decreased need to sleep
-Shortness of breath
-Love sickness?

Victim: *Grabs Chest* Ohh God!

Doctor: Whatcha have here is some Cayminitis. I'm going to prescribe you with 20 minute talk sessions to her for the next week. I'm going to need to see you sometime next week to see how things are going.

Victim: Thanks Doc. your a life saver.

Cayminitis by madame Irglin August 22, 2010

Clavicitis 

Clavicitis is the make believe disease you can pass on to your friends. A clavicle is your collorbone, but most people think it sounds dirty.

"Hey man hows it goin'?
"Stay away from me, dude! You've got clavicitis!"

Clavicitis by ClavicleCustard November 20, 2011