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Turtle Burglar

A person who has to poop so badly that others notice. Like a turtle head is about to emerge.
"Why is that old lady fidgeting around like that?"
"She's doing the poop dance because she's a turtle burglar"
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sea turtling

When one lays face down in the sand spread eagle, digs a hole, throws up in it, buries it and then proceeds to keep drinking.
Kelsey is sea turtling, time for the second part of the party.
by FriendOfSeaTurtling August 14, 2013
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Wang turtle

A penis that has an abnormally tough outer skin. Also known as a chode.
"O. yeah let get in there...."said the man "Ow did you put it in yet..." says the girl "yeah it feels so good doesn't it!" "Um... maybe on your end i'm not feeling anything on this end..."

later that night...

"Yeah i was with this guy Nick Motta earlier he has such a wang turtle..."
by Motta101 August 18, 2011
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turtle boner

A short dude who likes to go for taller chicks that are way out of his league.
Wow, did you hear that Luke started dating Sarah. What a turtle boner.
by Dik chez October 14, 2018
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Garden turtle

A bloke who sucks himself off watching wetsuits dry on the clothesline
by Uncy Joe April 18, 2018
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Turtle cake

A Turtle Cake is when a man has a small penis that is also uncircumcised that resembles a frightened turtle and is put between the ass cheeks of an unsuspecting victim, thus the turtle is between the cakes.
I would love to give her a turtle cake while she’s not looking.
by River.01 March 4, 2019
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turtle head

turtle head is a phenomenon when you have a dookie so large it peeks out the anus. referring to a scared turtle
dude can you hurry in the bathroom i have major turtle head.
by All america bitch December 24, 2018
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