Masturbation Wrinkles

When a guy jerks off more than 2 times a week, and they get wrinkly dicks from it. Especially bad when they are semi-soft.

"Girl , I went to go down on him and he had masturbation wrinkles, I left out of there.

by THEREALHONESTBRUTALBIATCH October 21, 2017

masturbating on the run

When a tardy individual is getting dressed on their way to where they're going.

Masturbating on the run is to get dressed on your way to the destination

Marge: Hurry up and get dressed we're gonna be late!
Rob: Fuck it, I'll just masturbate on the run let's just go.

I'm not one to masturbate on the run but I can't miss my grandmas funeral.

by Xtra3916 July 04, 2022

Retroactive masturbation

The act of masturbating to a girl (or guy) from your past who at one point was extremely attractive but is no longer due to aging or weight gain. The masturbator would then jerk off to a mental image of how the once attractive girl looked in the past (retroactively) rather than how she looks currently. This occurs quite often when thinking about aging female celebrities who at point were major sex symbols.

Similar to "nostalgia wank".

Rick: Yo man, did you see Chloë at our ten year high school reunion?

Matt: Yea, brah. She got fat. Fuckin' shame, she used to be sooooo hot.

Rick: I know right? I'm gonna find an old yearbook and beat off to the way she used to look in high school.

Matt: Good ol' retroactive masturbation! Ya know, for a quicker yank, you could just scroll backwards through her Facebook profile photos.

by jodielover81 October 04, 2018

The Masturbation Nation

The Fanbase of Jade Thirlwall

ME: I really like your shirt. Thats Jade on it, are you a fan?
Y/N: Yess! I am part of the masturbation nation

by DarkLarrie28 August 08, 2022

Panic Masturbation

The act of masturbation right before an impending tragedy or catastrophic event. Leads to a brisk and usually unsatisfying climax.

Ryan: did you hear about the new findings in flight 97 black box?
Kevin: nah man
Ryan: apparently several passengers broke out in a furious panic masturbation session during the nosedive

Kevin: how were the climaxes?
Ryan: brisk and usually unsatisfying

by Ryan McKevin July 02, 2013

Animal Masturbation

The act of masturbating an animal by me nigga.

Take this you stupid cat. This is how you Animal Masturbation

by haha yeah man that shits funny January 02, 2020

Masturbation Station

A place where males and females masturbate and take turns

After I do my chores I’ll ask I can go to the masturbation station with koen

by Boobiejams January 23, 2019