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Police

The police following us bro. Drive faster!
by It'sAboveMeNow April 19, 2020
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The Joke Police

A recently formed government sector of law and order tasked with monitoring social media for any words considered offensive that current day.

Initially the division was formed with pure intent with the goal to shade people who are shit at comedy so they do not continue pursuing a career in it, but recently there has been an unsanctioned shift in the direction of preventing all comedy because humour is the enemy of progress and cannot be tolerated under any circumstance.

Recent studies have shown that people find the division a waste of tax payers money and want them to be disbanded.

So far there have been no arrests and average sentences result in pointless cancel attempts on twitter which don't work, suggesting that people consider them a joke, which unfortunately means they will have to cancel themselves as no jokes are allowed by their own standards
"Did you hear the joke police tried to cancel Ricky Gervais?"
"lol good luck, they'll be gona long before he is"
by Longbeer Feet November 19, 2020
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SLEEP POLICE

Mysterious forces and powers whose only mission is too sabotage and control the lives of those who refuse to go to sleep for many many days and nights consecutively.
Everything is going wrong for me this week, cars broke, no cash, no way outta here. EVERYONE'S out to get me, its like their a special forces team ordered to wreak havoc on my small stupid world. Let me be Sleep Police I don't need your peace!
by Jack Casper November 30, 2020
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Police hospitality

The preferential, lighthanded treatment offered to lighter skinned people by peace officers.
Zach got some police hospitality down at the march: stuffed uncuffed into that piggy whip and they even opened door on the flipside for him.
by PeckerGnat July 10, 2020
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turkish police

person who is late

if you ask Turkish Polices for help they'll come to crime scene hour and hours later
Tinder Date : Are you turkish police? I've been waiting for you for an hour.
Fella : aww sorry
by moon n roses August 6, 2020
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alphabet police

The FBI, CIA, DHS, ATF - any American federal agency with petty bitches trying to arrest you for no goddamn reason
Can you believe they sent the Alphabet Police to Portland?
by Urban Toby August 24, 2020
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Instant Gratification Policing

When law enforcement officers unreasonably require that their commands be followed immediately and without hesitation. Almost all police abuse and killings stem from this inability to be patient, deescalate, and just listen to people first.
Instant Gratification Policing can happen when police say: "Turn around!" or "Put your hands behind your back!" or "Get on your knees!"
by Cigar Dave June 9, 2020
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