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Digital Junk Mail

Any sort of unrequested email, text or other social media communication, especially sexually-oriented messages or containing pictures of genitalia on the internet. Abbreviated: DJM
Sending Digital Junk Mail turns your social media into anti-social media especially when it contains pictures of genitalia.
by CrotchGourmet December 17, 2022
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"junk" filter abuse

Where you falsely tag one or more legitimate e-mails as "spam" merely because you'd prefer not to read the messages due to their containing unwelcome content, such as reminding you that you owe money, are responsible for performing certain arduous/unpleasant tasks, etc.
Practicing "junk" filter abuse may indeed prevent unwelcome e-mails from showing up in your inbox, but it merely "delays the inevitable"... the chickens are still gonna come home to roost eventually (i.e., your creditors and/or da cops are still gonna come knocking on your door in da end), but by then they will be "cackling mad" at your selfish/offhanded ignoring of them and their genuine issues with you, and so they will likely scatter poop and loose feathers all over you (i.e., deal with you a lot more harshly) when they finally arrive on your doorstep, rather than just placidly settling down in their stalls for the night, the way they probably would have if you had simply addressed their concerns in a timely/appropriate manner in da first place!
by QuacksO October 28, 2018
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Murphy's Law of "Junk"

"You can hold onto something for decades, and neither you nor anyone else will ever have a use for it, but then just as soon as you throw it out, either you will suddenly need it for something, or --- even more 'painful' --- **someone else** will come to you and humbly ask, 'Do you happen to have an extra ___?'" Rrrrrggggghhhhh----!!!
I'd had a couple of old 55-gallon oil-drums stashed in da garage for da past thirty years --- my grampa had given 'em to me when he and Gram were downsizing to move into an assisted-living apartment --- and they'd just sat there and gathered dust in da corner all that time. But then just two days --- TWO STINKIN' DAYS!! --- after I'd sent 'em to da crusher for recycling, a low-income neighbor dropped by and asked me if he could have them to use as burn-barrels --- guess dat was a classic case of Murphy's Law of "Junk" at work!!
by QuacksO July 24, 2018
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both hands on my junk

A phrase used to indicate that one is more than competent to deal with a situation and, frankly, they've got this shit handled.

Don't worry about it.
"Well, sounds like you've got it handled."

"OH, I'M HANDLING IT WITH BOTH HANDS ON MY JUNK!"
by lol_words October 3, 2018
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Madders Junk

Some say TotallyMadders Junk in the trunk is soop big he in fact needs 3 super truck trailers to carry it all. A mere act of him crossing the street has to be planned weeks in advance with city planning, traffic department, fire department, emergency reponse unit and the militairy. Legend has it that no female ever left his presence without walking out like a cowboy with tears in her eyes and a huge smile on her face.
by Infallable Word June 11, 2018
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junk file

The guy was a total junk file looking out for his next hit
by Forbiddentruth August 8, 2022
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Junk Bonding

Actively pursuing making friends with the wrong people for alternative gain or for self sabotage.
Example one:

Mike: Why are you talking to that guy?
John: Oh I'm junk bonding so that I can get us those football tickets.

Example two:

Howard: I have never understood why you talk to that woman.
Pete: I'm junk bonding with her cause I'm in a dark place and I need to see this through.
by Wholeeyo October 26, 2022
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