Douche Paddle

Someone who is bigger then a douche bag, yet smaller then a douche canoe. Thus meaning the Douche Paddle For the Douche Canoe.

Person 1 - 'Alright, you get half a quarter of my burger.'

Person 2 - 'Dude I haven't eaten since yesterday!'

Person 1 - 'Too bad, fag.

Person 2 - 'Dude you are such a Douche Paddle.

by JezzInMyPants November 1, 2009

douche hammock

A street legal 'monster truck' that never actually sees work or dirt. Inspires the question 'how did he climb into that?'. Virtually always driven by a male (the 'douche'), driver rarely seen with a collar or without head gear of some sort (ball cap or cowboy hat preferred). Extra credit for diesels, especially with the 'stacks' coming up through the bed behind the cab in an attempt to replicate the look of an 18-wheeler, ironically rendering the vehicle even more useless.

"I can't see anything in front of me because this douche hammock is blocking both lanes." (coughing on diesel smoke)

by talltimo October 25, 2011

douche nozzle

Someone that either gets on your nerves or is just a fucking bag of douche. You know that one person. He's even more of a douche than a douche bag, he's a douche nozzle. He has no idea that he's being an idiot and is not suave in any way.

Person 1: Jim talked my ear off about his "episode" last night with Sheila with all the gory details. Fuckin' skank.

Person 2: What a fuckin' douche nozzle!

by Not1douche March 4, 2009

field of douche

Describing any party heavily populated with douchebags to the point where one will literally be covered in douche upon entering. Such occurrences have begun to happen with increasing frequency, as teenagers become more violently attracted to rap, arrogance, and a penchant for acting knowledgeable, despite evidence on the contrary. College students, particularly, are quite susceptible to this behavior. Hence, nearly any college party can be likened to a field of douche. Avoid high school parties unless your whole body is as dirty as a rotten vagina.

I entered a field of douche with a raincoat and hid under it most of the time in fear, constantly citing one of Marlon Brando's famous lines in the film, Apocalypse Now: "The horror..the horror!"

by friend of bob June 19, 2004

total douche

A total douche is a phrase used to define a douchebag who has done a douchebaggish thing to you, personally. It's a synonym for douchebag but total douche has a lighter feel to it and it's not as serious. It's more often than not used when talking about a person when they're not around.

That ass thinks he's always the shit around me. He's a total douche.

That bitch fired me for no reason. What a total douche.

by RDK December 9, 2007

helpful douche

someone who is overwhelmingly helpful but comes off as a jackass

-hey guys instead of helping you finish this project am just going to stand in a corner and dictate everything that needs to be done and tell you how bad of a job your doing.
-thanks helpful douche

by lydia5 December 30, 2008

Douche Chill

1. A feeling of strong embarrasement for and verbal or physical act someone else has preformed.

1-a . Feeling the need to look away from an embarrasing moment on TV.

1-b. The experience you receive when your coworker allways says the wrong thing in an attempt to be funny.

2- Also reffered to as a D.C., so as not to offend the person making the akward comment or statement.

A: Watching Taylor Hicks attempt to kick over a microphone stand on american idol, I shivered as a douche chill washed over me.

B: The feeling received from viewing any of the MTV reality shows.

by chrispyr September 19, 2006