Phantom Boner

When the crease of a male's jeans appears to look like a boner as they sit down. One of the most annoying things experienced by man.

Betty: "Whoa, check out the size of that guy's wang!"
Sue: "Calm down, Betty, it's just a phantom boner."
Betty: "Damn!"

by The Whovian February 11, 2015

Phantom Dicked

Happens when your watching Virtual Reality porn, giving the feeling of your dick being touched

I was Phantom Dicked early.

by NerdsMan June 24, 2016

the phantom spank

when a man saws off his arm and then uses said arm to masterbate to lizzy mcguire

i just walked in on clint performing the phantom spank! said whoopi goldberg

by whoopiegoldberg April 15, 2010

phantom post

This is a post on MySpace, LiveJournal, Facebook or any other such web-site where the owner of the account is unaware of the post being made under their name. It usually happens when friends find out passwords or such.

A friend got a rude post from your myspace account that you never sent... it was a phantom post.

by Cody Kahne December 27, 2005

Phantom

One who finds a sick pleasure in disposing of his or her own fecal matter in or on property not belonging to themsleves, with the intent of inflicting severe emotional discomfort and stress.

Jake: (squinting)"Dude, I know your the phantom and that shit is foul!"

Joe: "I have no clue what your talking about".

Robby: "OH, GROW UP JAKE"!

Joe: "Yea Jake, Go suck a fatty"!

by Pirate Suite October 25, 2006

phatophobia

The irrational phobia of being popular/cool.

Eunice wears sweater vests and really high socks everyday. He must have phatophobia.

by Nonphatophobe May 19, 2008

Phantom Toke

Means to take a toke of a fag, spliff or any other smokable item without said item being lit.

I just had a phantom toke on that joint and it tastes gorgeous. Let's light this mother and get baked.

by Andy Burton December 16, 2008