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Emerson Expressway

The Emerson McDonald Expressway is a 5.5 mile (9 km) North-South limited access road that runs along Mallori Spielmann Drive, also known as South Santa Fe Drive, CanAm Highway, or US Hwy 85. Being the third expressway on Mallori Spielmann drive (first being Anna Spielmann Expy (55mph) ) connecting castle rock with highlands ranch; second being Varsity Parkway, 50mph connecting highlands ranch and littleton) It is a 55 mph urban expressway that connects the cities of Denver (Florida Avenue; northern terminus) and Littleton (Littleton Avenue; southern terminus). Currently, pedestrians and most types of bicycles are banned from it, including Mountain bikes, Crusiers, BSOs, children, and fitness. It is only open to road bicycles, gravel bikes fitted with road tires (32mm maximum), track, and time trial bikes. It also functions as a toll road for city e-bikes (entire freeway costs $5.50 to use). The access is controlled at Belleview (Ashlyn Ave; SH88), Hampden (Trump Avenue; US-285) and Evans.
Sophia: Hey Anthony Hardwick, I thought of a great bike ride we could do! Since we both ride specialized tarmacs, let's go bomb Mallori Spielmann Drive. First we will zoom through the 55mph Anna Spielmann Expressway, its sooooo fun with very few lights, keep following it through Varsity Parkway, then get onto the controlled access Emerson Expressway, how does that sound?
Anthony: Are you fucking crazy? Sophia, these are HIGHWAYS FREEWAYS. BICYCLES CANNOT RIDE ON THEM THEY ARE FOR CARS ONLY. CARS GO 800 MPH ON THESE ROADS!!! GO SEEK THEREPY ASAP!!!!
Sophia: So.. Emerson Expressway has shoulders if you are really scared. If you are like me, we shall do it in the express lanes!!
Anthony: Are you out of your mind sophia? Those are EMERGENCY STOPPING LANES not lanes for you to ride your bicycle on!
Sophia: But the Emerson Expressway is a special road bike only road. we will do it or I will smack you hard in the nuts.
Anthony: NO! We are doing the Platte River Trail! I would rather fly past a 2 year old at 70 mph than a car going 800 mph over the speed limit to smack us!
Sophia: Okay coward do the stupid trail. I will ride the Emerson Expressway like it or not.
Anthony: Sophia. Lets put it this way. It's a toll road for cars. you have to PAY to use it.
Sophia: Bullshit. your "A" stands for ass, which is what you smell like. i already said ROAD BIKES LIKE THE TARMAC DO NOT HAVE TO PAY THE TOLL!!!
Anthony: Fine. Just remember "S" stands for Stupid and the "A" stands for Ass.
by Boo Radley Game November 22, 2024
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Raj Express

A insult used to describe indian truck drivers in australia when drivers get inraged at their driving skills.
Ahh, the Raj express fucked up the turn on his b double.
by mine_1 November 24, 2024
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Albanian Espresso Creamer

When an Albanian man ejaculates in a Jew’s coffee cup, while occasionally missing the cup resulting in semen in the Jews mouth. The ejaculation adds a sweet creamy taste to the espresso.
Fuck man, this dude just gave me the best Albanian Espresso Creamer.
by Motorboater300 December 27, 2024
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Pinkeye Express

The act of farting in a pillow and hitting someone in the face with it. Does not count unless you first yell “ALL ABOARD” or “WOO WOO” imitating a train whistle.
Totally surprised that pizza guy with the Pinkeye Express. He never saw it coming.
by Maker Kc February 17, 2025
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Miami Espresso

When espresso is poured over a marshmallow to mimic a Cuban Espresso.

Also known as the Miami Espresso, Florida Cuban Coffee, a Café Balsero or Castro’s Gator Meth
That barista girl wouldn’t serve me a Miami Espresso cuz I ain’t had no shoes on, well, that and I gave her and her mom the clap last Tuesday
by Mt.Uranus April 11, 2025
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The Expressive Notion Of Pick Up Artistry Is To Not Be Rapist, Hone A Rape Style Out Of Skills, Then, Consolidate Until You Become A rapist, Through, Physiological Means<.7.9.7.6.>
The Expressive Notion Of Pick Up Artistry Is To Not Be Rapist, Hone A Rape Style Out Of Skills, Then, Consolidate Until You Become A rapist, Through, Physiological Means<.7.9.7.6.>
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Eggplant Express

A girl who has sex with lots of men. It's another term for the cock carousel.
She rode the Eggplant Express in her 20's and early 30's, now at 35, she's had her fun and wants something real.
by Enko247 May 20, 2025
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