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Done Up Like a Kipper

Done up/stiched up like a kipper, surely takes it's meaning from the term red herring, which means to mislead or distract from an important issue, in a trickster style.

A Red Herring, in the literal sense, is a particularly strong smelling fish called a Kipper that has turned a red colour following the smoking process traditionally used to preserve it.
Therefore, to be done or stiched up like a kipper, clearly means to be duped or tricked by false information that was there for all to see, (in hindsight).
For example: when someone purchases an item they believe to be far superior to what it turns out to be, based on the persuasion and false information by the seller.

He was done up like a kipper when he bought that car. Meaning the car was a pile of s*** and he was tricked when he payed top dollar for it.
by squeeze163 August 4, 2016
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jobs a kipper

a job well done, to be pleased with a job you've just done. Dierived from "jobs a good'un", into "jobs a gudgeon" (which is a type of fish), into "jobs a fish" and finally into "jobs a kipper" (being a particurly smelly fish).
John; "you finished changing that wheel yet?"
Mike; "oh yes, 'jobs a kipper' "
by beetlebodger October 19, 2009
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Giddy Kipper

Someone who is overly excitable or stupid.
John: Did you nail that girl last night?
Rob: No i came in my pants
John: Ya giddy kipper!
by johanmirfin February 16, 2010
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split me kipper

to vigorously insert one's fist into a female's genitalia
ooooh ay, i split ya ma's kipper last night.
by pablo dahill's ma October 2, 2003
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salted your kipper

ew you just salted your kipper, while eddie danced provocatively.
by finchh fuckerr May 5, 2010
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Hairy Kipper

A hirsute herring that has been split in butterfly fashion from tail to head along the dorsal ridge. They feed at the bottom of the deepest ocean (Western Pacific) and are so rare that they remain undiscovered by man.
A popular way for folically challenged druids to express astonishment in public, as in, "well slap my thigh with a hairy kipper".
by Busty Gus January 15, 2013
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wet kipper

Pathetic, passive, non-aggressive person who has a fat chance of becoming courageous or forthright due to a submissive nature.

Hails from wet (something saturated with water) and kipper (Scottish fish dish)...hence, a wet kipper!
Ah, don't be such a wet kipper!
by Klaus October 19, 2004
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