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emergency cunt

A female who is less than desireable in looks or personality
but will give it up without much effort on your part.
A woman that will make do during a dry spell.
Any old port in the storm.
A warm place to put it.
Emergency snatch, emergency pussy, emergency twat,
whatever you can find when your dick is harder than times
in '29.
I am so horny I may have to resort to some emergency cunt.
by jsd9632 January 12, 2012
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emergency lotion

The stash of small lotion samples taken from hotels that you turn to when you run out of your trusty old Jergens.
I was about to rub one off last night and I was out of Jergens... thank god for my emergency lotion
by hprocks July 5, 2014
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emergencycondriac

1) Someone who fakes emergencies in the hope some idiot will come running to save them
2) someone who fakes emergencies and goes to hospital simply for a break from their responsibilities
Wimper sound....
I need to go to hospital i think it's an emergencycondriac and my kids be driving me nuts i need a break!
Im in hospital having emergencycondriac somebody look after my kids and bring me a cheeseburger!
by Asparagusjuicebox August 18, 2019
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Context emergency

A situation in which a snippet of conversation is heard that (often) sounds much more scary or perverted than it actually is.
Person A: ...and then he shit on the floor!
Person B: Context emergency!
Person A: I have a new puppy; he isn't quite housebroken yet.
by Scott and Nikki July 7, 2011
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honeypot emergency

An urgent situation in which a bear must drop all of his plans to satisfy an important booty call.
Sorry I'm late, everyone - I had a honeypot emergency with the guy I met at the Mid-Atlantic Leather conference last night.
by Tobymike January 15, 2009
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emergency repair procedure #1

When a piece of equipment malfunctions, the proper response is to kick it as soon as possible in the hope that it rectifies the problem.
How expensive the equipment is and the time it would take a technician to arrive, however short, are irrelevant.
It is usually only succeeds in worsening the problem, however, most techs appreciate the user trying at least some form of repair themselves. Hence, the rule.
McCoy: Chalmers, the transmitter is down again.
Chalmers: What were you doing?
McCoy: Trying to make a call.
Chalmers: Then what did you do?
McCoy: Emergency repair procedure #1
Chalmers: You kicked it?
McCoy: Yep.
Chalmers: Well, at least you tried something.
by Scale Enlie March 5, 2008
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Emergency

Unplanned incident or situation requiring immediate attention.
Acceptable excuse for a late night phone call.
Getting injured

Getting lost/scared at a theme park (Knott's Scary Farm)

The End of the World!!

Teacher: Why did you not come to class yesterday?
Tommy: I had an emergency!
Sally: Having a hangover and forgetting is not an "emergency" :P
by gus15rz October 21, 2011
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