Ploppy Seconds

It's when you poop right after someone in the same bathroom where they just pooped.

"Oh man I got to take a poop"
"I just went, you may want to wait"
"No worries, I'll just get ploppy seconds"

by The Great Jackal March 1, 2009

2 seconds

From the great stoner movie "Shawn of the Dead."
2 seconds is the theoretical time it takes to do something totally unnesecary or dumb.

Tim "Argh, get this thing off me!"
John "2 seconds," (pulls out camera) "say cheese!"

by LucySkyDiamond April 24, 2005

sloppy seconds

Alas, this word has now leaked into general usage and people are taking it to mean 'ill-fitting hand-me-downs'.

Get the truth out. It does actually having sex with a woman who has just had (obviously unproteced) sex with another man for the simple joy of sliding about in his juices mixed with hers.

Hey, you shag 'er first man, I fancy a bit of sloppy seconds tonight.

by Raversaur February 9, 2005

5 seconds of fury

The five seconds that seem like a year when you hear someone opening your bedroom door whilst you are masturbating. It usually consists of closing the porn website, finding another website, pulling up your underwear and pants and trying not to cum. Not a good feeling.

Jesus, i felt like i was going to have a heart attack when i heard my mom opening my door during my midnight wank. Luckily I have mastered the 5 seconds of fury.

by JACK665 August 11, 2008

One Fucking Two Seconds

1. A measure of time.

2. More specifically, the amount of time it would take "Diesel Dan" to fuck up someone who has pissed him off.

3. This unit of time, being so quick, has yet to be calculated to an exact length. Still, researchers and witnesses to an event lasting one fucking two seconds have concluded that it is undoubtedly shorter than a New York minute, blink of an eye, two shakes of a lambs tail, and Superman in flight, which also by default makes it faster than a speeding bullet.

"Fuck that. I'll fuck him up in one fucking two seconds!"

by Road Block June 11, 2006

sloppy seconds

To engage in sexual intercouse where ejaculation has previously ocurred in the orifice by another male within a short time frame. The sperm and semem is then used as a natural lubrication by the second male. Although the term may be used to describe both vaginal and anal intercourse with a male or female, it is traditionally used to describe vaginal intercourse.

I'm tired of always getting dad's sloppy seconds with my sister

by King of Porn October 25, 2003

salty seconds

When a drunk girl during a party performs oral sex on a male counterpart and swallows the liquid explosion, then returns to the party and makes out with someone else.

"Yo....Katie just sucked me off and swallowed my load and now she making out with some other dude. That homo just got my salty seconds."

by Nick Tahou January 25, 2006