microsoft sam

The sweet ass dude that you can tell to say funny ass words and he says them in a really funny voice. You really need to try this. Its some funny shit.
-How To Get Microsoft Sam-
1.Click on Start
2.Click on Control Panel
3.Click on Speech
4.Type some funny shit and let him say it.

*/-THINGS FOR MICROSOFT SAM TO SAY THAT ARE FUNNY AS SHIT-/*
just copy and paste

1. I am Sam, Hear Me Roar, Bitch!
2. gdfgdhgidfghdfgiudfndfgopdfgdfnguidfuigigudfuigndfugnsdfgnpdggnuidfgdfngudfpggnuigpgnuidngdfnguidfnguidfgndgndfuigngh
3. Nigger

by Mic August 5, 2004

microshaft

microsoft is also the evil empire micro$oft and microsloth

I am proud of microshaft they shaft there customers a little more each day and they are still in bussiness

by tom December 18, 2003

Microsoft second

Usually equal to 3-4 seconds when the computer is new.. After one month of use though, this turns into 10-15... and After a year you might as well go to bed if it tells you it has one second left.

"One second left on download" ..... 20 minutes later......
"One second left on download" ..... 1 microsoft second later.... you wake up from your 3 hour nap

by Apple FTW April 27, 2012

Microsoft Minute

A seemingly random period of time required for a (Microsoft) computer system to recognize changes made and begin working properly. This phrase is most commonly associated with Active Directory (Windows Server) applications.

"I just changed your password on the server, so in 15 Microsoft minutes you should be able to log on. If it still doesn't work after 15 minutes wait another hour and it should work then."

by Carl Boyd October 8, 2004

Microsoft CD

A CD that has been spawned at MicroSoft.

An Apple engineer once said "They say, if you play a MicroSoft CD backwards, you can hear satan. But that's nothing. Play it forward and it installs Windows! :O"

by Hampikizzel Fo' Shizzel May 31, 2005

microsoft meditation moment

waiting for a computer to reboot

"while installing NT 4.0 Server, I had many Microsoft Meditation Moments to relax"

by Daniel Trivin August 22, 2006

microsoft works

A tawdry software program, usually bundled free by lower-end computer manufacturers, in an effort to keep their PC hardware prices low. Microsoft Works has become a byword for format incompatibilities and system crashes.

"Tarquin, I am sorry you can't do the MS Word homework that your teacher set you for school, but daddy went for the cheap option, hence you will have make do with this godawful Microsoft Works program. I am so sorry."

by Jason the monkey November 7, 2007