Anti-bac Fap

When your Fapping and need some lube but you have nothing other than a bottle of Antibacterial Hand sanitiser, of course you use it anyway because its all you've got and lets be honest the 'old boy' needed a good wash anyway.
John: Morning Dave, what did you get up to last night?
Dave: Oh not much, I did have an Anti-bac Fap whilst watching Django tho.

John: I just think its great that you'll admit that. What the fuck is wrong with you?
Dave: Well I ran out of lube and to be honest I couldn't be arsed to shower today anyway.
by Builtuponthesand February 09, 2015
Get the Anti-bac Fap mug.

Fap Free February

Fap Free February, which may also be abbreviated FFF (not to be confused with an all female threesome), is a continuation of No Nut November(NNN) and a second chance for those who have failed NNN to redeem themselves.

This month long event follows the same rules and conditions as No Nut November, but is even more extreme. No form of fapping of any kind is allowed and you are immediately disqualified for beating the meat, creaming the corn, or attempting to blow a load.

Fap Free February is followed by Masturbation Marathon March, the equivalent of Destroy Dick December. Only those who have successfully completed Fap Free February are invited to join in on Masturbation Marathon March. Any homie found to be partaking in Masturbation Marathon March without a Fap Free February certificate of completion will get scrapped.
peter: i dont wanna do no nut November bro it's overhyped
tom: how about you try fap free February instead homeslice, it makes March hit different
peter: aight i believe you aha
by ASecondChance November 02, 2019
Get the Fap Free February mug.

mc fap nap

An extremely pleasurable past time which is considered by many as the most awesome activity one can partake in whilst alone. A mc fap nap consists of three individual activities in the following order:

1. Purchasing and consuming a large meal from McDonalds, at least a large double quarter pounder mcvalue meal or equivalent.

2. A well prepared and lengthy session of masturbation i.e. lights dimmed, lube, a high quality yet filthy porno.

3. A nap in a large comfy bed lasting at least 2 hours.

Side effects include extreme relaxation and feelings of contentment. Mc fap naps should be used sparingly, so as not to diminish the pleasurable effects of the mc fap nap (too much of a good thing). One should also be careful not to overdose on the awesomeness one experiences whilst engaging in this activity, as such a mistake may prove fatal.
Joel, after a particularly long day of listening to trance, breaking things and stalking pwt on Facebook, needed to unwind. He got into his 4wd and drove to Maccas and obtained 2 medium double cheeseburger meals. When he arrived home he got naked and consumed his prey in the om nom nom fashion. He then lit some scented candles and dimmed the lights, put on some mood music (Armin van Buuren) and got out the baby oils and put on his favourite episode of Rex Hunt Fishing Adventures and began furiously mangling his meat. After cleanup he curled up in his bed for a nice arvo nap before his dinner of beef jerky and chocolate milk. When his "Priscilla, Queen of the Desert" alarm clock woke him he unfurled from the fetal position he always sleeps in stretched out and revelled in the awesomeness of the mc fap nap he had just undertaken. All is well.

by Redhead and the fat man January 08, 2009
Get the mc fap nap mug.

Crap N' Fap

Greg, "Hey John you wanna hang today?"

John, "Yea man, I'll be over as soon as I do a quick Crap N' Fap"
by Fapking October 30, 2011
Get the Crap N' Fap mug.

New Year's Fap

The act of masturbating seconds before the new year, and ejaculating right as the clock strikes twelve, starting the new year off perfectly.
Bob: "Dude, the new year is in 5 minutes."

Joe: "Get the tissues". "It's time for the New Year's fap."
by inconspicuous January 01, 2014
Get the New Year's Fap mug.

After Fap Regrets

The feeling of regret after one has masturbated to a girl or guy, he/she was either not attracted to, or felt annoyed by, prior to masturbation.
Dude.. the other night i was flirting with Kim.. after Masturbating i had some After Fap Regrets and didn't talk to her anymore.. Made things awkward 1st block.

Also commonly used as After Fap: Dude i found out she was fat after i masturbated.. Major After Fap
by Bro_ca_Cola March 02, 2011
Get the After Fap Regrets mug.

mobile fap

Porn videos/images/GIFs made for mobile devices. Usually the content is designed to load fast on low bandwidth Internet connections.
There is no WiFi here. I'm gonna have to watch mobile fap using my phone's data network.
by dguiron March 30, 2016
Get the mobile fap mug.