Morning Dewey

A morning dewey is when you jizz all over your friends face while they are sleeping or are passed out from consuming copious amounts of alcohol.

Asshole #1: "How was your morning sunshine?"

Asshole #2: "Fucking shit. I was super hungover and I woke up with a morning dewey on face. It had dried up and I couldn't fucking open my eyes. It was the worst."

Asshole #1: "Hahaha, I was the one who gave you the morning dewey. I'm so awesome"

Asshole #2: Go fuck yourself.

by Ola G. October 20, 2010

Morning Stem

British slang for morning wood

boy: you're only here because daddy gets morning stem and mum takes advantage of it.

by fernvndooo April 28, 2015

Morning Wood Fairy

It's the mystical spirit that turns your soft serve into rock candy.

When everyone's asleep,
the Morning Wood Fairy comes at night,
she makes our sausages hard,
and vanishes out of sight.
I woke up in the morning,
and I got up to pee
but then I last discovered
my sapling turned into a tree.

by Cinna the Poet October 11, 2016

silent morning

A morning in which is free of talking from the girl you just boned the night before.
or
a morning where you wake up and find out the girl has left...leaving the room quiet and peaceful

"Man, last night I boned this boom broad and the next morning she smiled at me and then eventually left. No hassles, no strings attached...was the best silent morning I ever had"

by Don Stefano July 29, 2008

Vaginal Moanings

artistic expression used to describe the latest flood of cookie cutter songs from every current-era female pop musician. Recognizable by the usual accompaniment of pianos or violins, these are the songs that are inducing the collective menstrual cycles of the radio free world. Although usually reserved for female musicians, the term can, in some instances, be applied to the critique of male musicians if the estrogen level is deemed beyond the “Seminal Trappings” term assigned to the same music.

Female: Recently, while watching VH1, I found myself really enjoying the Vaginal Moanings of Sara Bareilles and Taylor Swift.
Male: Recently, while watching VH1, I found myself really enjoying the Vaginal Moanings of James Blunt.

by John Wesley February 6, 2008

monday morning surprise

The process by which a male obtains a condom and proceeds to urinate and ejaculate into it. The condom is sealed and inserted into the vagina of a sleeping girlfriend or wife. The surprise is completed when the male attempts to give her an Alabama Hot Pocket causing the condom to explode.

guy #1: yo that bitch is trippin, b.
guy #2: thats why i gave her a monday morning surprise and got the fk out of there.

by cot4lifeyo1 July 30, 2009

Morning Delight

Morning Delight - to achieve coitus in the a.m., usually prior to work or somesuch other pre ordained event, successfully and without causing both happy participants to be late!

"Morning Bob! You look happy today!"

"Cheers Phil!, yeah, managed a little morning delight with the missus!!!"

by chefjim March 17, 2009