Speed Limit Party

A small to medium sized social gathering where young adult Mormons get together to do bland, morally unambiguous activities such as Go Fish, crocheting, and (as the namesake suggests) driving the speed limit to the local soda jerk.

Katie invited me to hang out on Friday night, but it turned out to be a boring ass speed limit party. We made dirt cups and drank sparkling juice. I felt like I was in kindergarten again.

by Yoinky McSploinky May 14, 2025

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Iowa cornstalk party

An orgy that takes place in the mid west with 13 men and 2 women where they insert a jar of pickles up your rectum then proceed to masturbate with it two at a time, then you put the feces of another member up your own ass, then everyone has a pillow fight naked and oiled up.

Who should we invite to the Iowa cornstalk party?

by glenn quagmire_ May 28, 2025

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Related Words

pasty • pasty face • pasty barm • Pasty Bastard • pasty smasher • Pasty Smashing • pasty whacker • pasty white • pasty white boy • pasty as fuck

Ham Salad Party

2 cups assorted pork meat
1/2 cup De’Jon’s mustard
1/4 oz Baby feelings

1 Cup juice of baby feelings

1/2 Cup hand sourced mayo (undersized and under fertilized)
Vigorously whipped by foot
Dash of “black” pepper
1 oz Curly’s ass parsley
1 packet gelatin in a fridge for 2 hours

Baby bird in bunt pan then circle to completion.

My fuckin’ guts are ham salad party stuffed after that CJ party at Gene’s house last Tuesday.

by Straight Up Ums July 1, 2025

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