clout monkey

Someone who constantly wants clout and brags about having clout
Yo stacey is a whole clout monkey”
by skee__t January 05, 2019
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Gush monkey

A person who is extremely gushy in the emotional sense.
Dawn: You are the best guy ever. I can't believe we are in this relationship. I've always wanted someone like you in my life.

Bob: I didn't know you were this much of a gush monkey. :p. It's cute.
by gushmonkey April 20, 2011
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Taser Monkey

A police officer, especially one who reflexively uses his or her Taser in situations in which a real cop would rely on his or her wits and communication skills.
Peace Loving Citizen: Excuse me, officer, might you have the time?

Taser Monkey (later, to Grand Jury): The perpetrator approached me and presented a reasonable request in a peaceable manner. I had no choice but to tase him. And tasers are "non-lethal" so it's obvious he died on purpose just to frame me.

Grand Jury: But your victim was a 90-year-old man with a heart condition in a wheelchair with an oxygen tank... asking for the time. And you killed him.

Taser Monkey: Exactly. He could have been a terrorist with a wheelchair bomb, plotting to kill me and everyone else in the area. A lesser cop might have answered with the time and we could all be dead right now!

Grand Jury: Oh right! What were we thinking? Of course we'll side with you no matter what. Fuck the citizens!
by taserbrain February 12, 2010
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spazzy monkey

A sexual position on the secret last page of the kama sutra sex book, in which the male hangs upside down from a rope attatched to the ceiling and another male/female hangs from the first males genitals. The rope is then rapidly swung in an anti clockwise direction, putting a lot of stress on the first males genitals; the primary objective being to enlarge the penis.
faiz had a 7 foot long dick, must have been practisibg the spazzy monkey often.
danesh has the biggest penis I have ever seen. That's coz he does the spazzy monkey with joshua
by Al Jabreezi Jihad November 23, 2013
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shelf monkey

A librarian whose primary job is reshelving books.
The book is checked into the library but I can't find it; maybe the shelf monkey has it on his cart.
by Donavan Mikulsky August 07, 2007
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favela monkey

A derogatory term for Brazilians living in slums
@Gaules so many brazil favela monkeys
by okmnjiuhbvgytfcxdr July 15, 2022
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flab monkey

Someone who jiggles when you punch them. Usually eats leftover tacos for breakfast.
Chris is such a flab monkey.
by Dr. KLUE August 06, 2008
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