Griffin Johnson

Griffin Johnson was a ex of Dixie Damelio. He was a cheater and an person who said “send toes.”

Someone: OMG GRIFFIN JOHNSON CHEATED IN DIXIE DAMELIO SAYING “SEND TOES”

Me: I KNOW OMG I HATE HIM

by TAELOR THEE STALLION October 06, 2020

Tristan Johnson

Gay ass loser who likes choads

Wow ,he’s such a Tristan Johnson !

by Ilikeyourmomlol March 01, 2018

randy johnson

Left Handed Pitcher for the New York Yankees

Now Pitching for the New York Yankees Randy Johnson

by Louis January 01, 2005

Sergeant Johnson

When you are getting head, on a really cumfy bed, smoking a fat blunt, and playing halo reach at the same time

charlie was on the bed getting a sergeant johnson from lexi. and halo reach is godly

by blazingcrazing69 August 07, 2010

curtis johnson

he's a great cousin who acts like an older brother to me protective smart and reliable

thanks for being there for me curtis johnson

~jackie

by wolfgirl1213 August 16, 2009

Magic Johnson

The miraculous effects of Viagra. A play on the name of the basketball player.

Albert was getting on in years, so he turned to Magic Johnson for assistance in pleasing his wife.

by Koshevoi July 24, 2010

Jack Johnson

Famous musician who has become a rorschach test for the music-listening world at large. If you dig Jack Johnson, you're either an unwashed ignorant member of the common sheepish folk, or deeply into weed in all it's forms. If you don't like his stuff, you're either into "good" music, hateful of relaxation, or aware of him selling out the good surfer name. It's all in interpretation really.

Example One:

Fan: "I like that new Jack Johnson album!"
Critic: "Why?"
Fan: "Because, it's, uh, relaxing...and, uh...uh...relaxing."
Critic:"Is that all? His music is miserable and generic. How can you enjoy absolute dung like his (I won't even say music because it degrades the very concept) 'surfer' sound?"
Fan: "Baaaa."

Critic: "I hate the new Jack Johnson album."
Fan: "Why?"
Critic: "Because it's cliche, simple, boring, without edge or real emotion, and lacks all good things I like in pop music."
Fan: "Here's what I think: Get off your high horse and try to understand his appeal to people. In this busy, hectic world he offers a break and release from the pressures of daily life, making people happy in the process, and if that's bad then sue me. Why don't you remove the stick of music snobbery from you-know-where and get a life?"
Critic: "You just criticized me. That's my job."

by teamugcollective July 07, 2010